Minnesotan on the Loose

Looking Into You

2008-10-21T23:47:00.001-05:00

Well I looked into a house I once lived in
Round the time I first went on my own
When the roads were as many as the places I had dreamed of
And my friends and I were one

You never know when something strange will decide to happen to you. The other week, I was jack hammering up a section of my floor in the basement to clear the way for the installation of new drain lines for a bathroom I am adding in the basement. I decided to take a coffee break from the hard work and soak in a bit of the day’s news from the ink spread across the Star Tribune and noticed a black Toyota pulling up to park outside my window. A short, happy-looking woman with closely cropped hair, somewhere in her late fifties or early sixties, emerged from the vehicle and started to walk up my steps and front walkway, distractedly looking at the landscaping and neighboring houses. I greeted her at the door as anyone would in this sort of situation, with a hesitant “Umm, can I help you?”

“Hi,” she replied, “my name is Joanne and I grew up in this house.”

Now the distance is done
And the search has begun
I’ve come to see where my beginnings have gone

Joanne came inside and looked around the room. She asked if I was renting the place (the previous owners had rented to college aged kids during the last few years they owned the place) and I told her no, that I had purchased the property in late 2006 and was working on fixing up the place. Joanne informed me that she was in town from Dallas for a class reunion at Holy Angeles and couldn’t resist stopping by to see the place. She talked about how much she loved the dark woodwork in the living room, how her brother had sunk himself for weeks on end into fixing up the place after her father had died in 2001, how expensive it was to replace the foundation after they had discovered it was in poor structural shape.

As we wandered about the room, Joanne remarked how her father had watched his tools like a hawk. She talked about how painful her father’s death had been and how hard it hit her family.

All the walls and the windows were still standing
And the music could be heard at the door
Where the people who kindly endured my odd questions
Asked if I came very far

I took Joanne downstairs and showed her the projects I had been working on, how I was updating the basement to add a bedroom, bathroom and media room. She was impressed and laughed that her family had always joked about her father adding a bathroom out on the porch, something that is even more laughable given the current state of my porch (not good). Joanne said that even more than the house, what she missed was the neighborhood; that she remembered a happy childhood with good friends, running through the yards of the houses up and down the block, each one filled with people that cared about and supported each other.

She talked about the flower and vegetable competitions her father would have with the neighbors, how she and her friends would take their bikes down to Lake Nokomis to go swimming in the summer time, and how cold she remembered it being waiting for the bus to take her to school. As she was walking out the door, Joanne turned to me and said “I’m not sure if this sort of thing is important to you or not, the vibe of a place. But if it is, you should know that you are living in a place with great memories, where people loved each other very much for a long time.”

Well we spoke the changes that would find us farther on
And it left me so warm and so high
But as I stepped back outside to the grey morning sun
I heard that highway whisper and sigh
Are you ready to fly?

It seems to me that people seek out their origins for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes it’s to see that the things they remember still exist, that the world as they knew it is still reality in some small way. Sometimes it’s to remember something that it seems the rest of the world has moved on from with little or no care, something lost that cannot be replaced. And still others some sort of smeary in-between, less defined, but no less powerful.

Nothing lasts forever – that seems to be the lesson of looking back, of revisiting where you come from. We are doomed with the knowledge that eventually the people we love will die, the things we have accomplished will be forgotten, and the places we have lived will crumble. I guess in the face of such hopelessness, sometimes it’s good to see that some part of who, what, and where you have been is still standing.

And I looked into the faces all passing by
It’s an ocean that will never be filled
And a house the grows older
And finally crumbles
That even love cannot rebuild

Commuting in a World of $4 Gas

2008-08-13T21:06:00.002-05:00

I've started riding my bike to work. It takes me right around 30 minutes to peddle my way to St. Louis Park, almost all of it on paths and avoiding riding in traffic.

This is the route I would normally drive to work:

View Larger Map

This means that every time I ride my bike, I'm avoiding 18.4 miles of car travel. I'm hoping to track my progress on a new blog soon, but so far I've bike commuted 2 days, which means 36.8 miles of car commute avoided.

It's a start!

Lakers & Celtics Game 1, Part Deux

2008-06-05T21:55:00.003-05:00

And now a follow-up live blog of the second half:

Uh oh, Pierce goes down. Of course, will we see Pierce make a dramatic comeback to inspire his team? This injury has the same feeling as when Bird banged his head and came back, or when Magic sprained his ankle against Ohio State in 79 then came back. Could spell trouble for the Lakers.
The NBA needs to step up enforcement of the moving screen penalty. Seriously, every pick PJ Brown sets is moving. Pretty easy for Ray Allen to get open when he has a fullback blocking for him as he darts around the court.
Yeahp, here comes Pierce. Crap. Of course, I'm not sure he was out long enough to warrant a full fledged "holly crap, Pierce is playing with a life-threatening shrapnel wound, I better step it up so we don't lose this game" from his teammates.
Kobe's hang time on the alley-oop from Fisher with 2:50 to play in the 3rd was simply unreal. What an athlete.
And Kobe follows it up with a double teamed, hand in his face, falling away from the basket 20 footer. The man is an assassin.
Two big threes from Pierce to put Boston up 4. Pierce is a warrior, no doubt about that, and he would be truly unstoppable if he didn't let himself get psyched out by other players.
Through the end of the third, Boston is maintaining a big lead in rebounds, 33-21. It's actually kind of surprising they aren't up by more than 4.
Is it just me or is the split screen ABC commercial with Kobe and KG about liking the "fear" kind of ridiculous? Does anybody see that commercial and think KG is anywhere near as ready as Kobe is? I mean, I love the Big Ticket, but there's a reason he's never been to the finals before and Kobe has 3 rings.
Why exactly was that not a back court violation? Because Garnett jumped in the air? So if you make contact with the ball in the backcourt after going over the line but happen to be jumping it's allowed? I never knew that.
OK we need to officially nickname PJ Brown "The Fullback." Can the Vikings look at teaming him up with Adrian Peterson in the fall? I suppose the danger would be that he would set an NFL record for holding penalties in a season. Unreal.
The Lakers sure are having trouble executing offensively down the stretch. When you have Gasol, Odom, and Bryant on your team and you are consistently having Ronny Turiaf and Sasha Vujacic take shots, it's time for a timeout.
2 minutes to go and Kobe has only scored 2 in the fourth quarter? Tough to believe the Lakers will pull this one out.
And Garnett gets the follow-up dunk of his life. How does Gasol not box him out on that play? That's gonna be a youtube classic.
And it's all over, the Celtics take a classic game one to start this series off.

Wow. If the first game is any indication, this looks like it will be a monster of a series. Biggest questions remaining from tonight's game (and my predictions):

Have the Celtics stopped Kobe or was he just not hitting?

Umm, definitely the latter.

Can anyone in the Laker front-court keep KG off the boards?

Not looking like it.

Will the Celtics continue to get the kind of production off the bench they got tonight?

Doubtful, but Cassell has come through on a big stage before.

What defensive adjustments will Phil Jackson make to contain Paul Pierce?

Continue to force Pierce to be a jump shooter, tonight's strong showing from outside was an aberration.

Will Eddie House's son see more playing time than Eddie?

More than likely, yes.

Is Luke Walton going to make any impact off the bench?

At home? Absolutely. On the road? Hopefully he can D-up and pull down some rebounds.

Will Ronny Turiaf resort to his normal Rastafarian dreads after the Duncan MacLeod pony tail didn't work?

Man I hope so.

Things are off to a great start!

The NBA The Way It Was Meant To Be

2008-06-05T21:34:00.002-05:00

Thought's on tonight's first half between Boston and LA:

Kobe Bryant doesn't panic, he waits...
Gasol's talent as a low-post scorer could really hurt KG's ability to rotate and protect the rim from the weakside because it's harder to rotate another defender to cover him as the Celtics did against Rasheed Wallace. Key stat for Garnett from the first half: zero blocks.
Pierce cannot get into foul trouble in this series, he's far to important to Boston's offense. They really struggled to score with Pierce off the court.
Rebounding the ball and holding it above your head for the outlet pass is really a lost art in the NBA and dramatically reduces the effectiveness of team's transition offense. Compare the way Odom, Gasol, Garnett, and Perkins rebound the ball to the way Kareem, McHale, Bird, and Rambis rebounded the ball.
Rajon Rondo is completely outclassed by Derek Fisher in this series. It really isn't even close.
Score at halftime: 51-46 Lakers. Another fiercely competitive game between the Lakers and Celtics for the title. Does it get any better than this?

Gopher Gloom

2008-04-26T01:26:00.002-05:00

Ahh, what a satisfying Friday evening in Minneapolis! Tonight, Kyle Sexton (K-Sex), Caboose, Mom, Pops, and I attended the Gopher Spring game. I must admit, I was really looking forward coming into tonight's game to seeing some of the Juco recruits picked up by Brewster & Co. during the off season and seeing how various players had developed. Overall, tonight's inter-squad scrimmage was a bit of a snooze and didn't provide much in terms of confidence for the coming season. Some thoughts:

The Gophers were wise to recruit all those wide receivers. Judging by how slow our current receiver corps looked against our defensive secondary we will need all the speed Vincent Hill and Brandon Green can provide, although it should be noted starting WR Erik Decker was not playing tonight.
Gophers and quarterbacks do not mix. Webber was unimpressive. Mortenson was disappointing. Pittman was injured. Brewster was unpolished. Marqueis Gray was still in Indiana. Suffice to say, tonight's game did not leave me confident about our QB situation.
The D-line is showing promise. Anthony Jacobs has bulked up to a solid 285 and if he can maintain the speed that made him an elite defensive end recruit back in 2007, he should be a monster in pass rushing downs. Derrick Onwuachi looked good at right defensive end. VanDeSteeg looks to have recovered from last year's broken wrist and should provide good balance to the line. If we can get some size at the defensive tackle position, the line should be much improved from last year.
Can Duane Bennett stay healthy? No doubt he's quick and has some good moves to shake tackles, but I keep getting the feeling he's about 10 pounds too light to survive the Big Ten season intact.
We need corners. Marcus Sherels showed promise tonight, but Ryan Collado seems hopelessly lost. Hopefully Traye Simmons, Tim Dandridge, and Simoni Lawrence can make big contributions as freshmen.
Ben Kuznia was an animal tonight. I'm putting the over/under at him being second team All Big Ten in 2008 at 40%.
The linebackers looked solid. Sam Maresh, Gary Tinsley, and Spencer Reeves should make this group even better.
Harold Howell fumbled the first punt of the game and allowed an interception on his next time out on the field. Yikes.

Let's hope the new freshmen can provide some much needed talent to this team!

Recent Reading

2008-04-16T21:02:00.002-05:00

A few links to some reading over the past week:

Memo to Petraeus & Crocker
A thought provoking opinion piece on the recent testimony by the lead General in Iraq. Interesting how even the business of murder can be made PC.

Bill Simmons' LVP to MVP - Part I & Part II
The section on Tim Thomas has to be the highlight, though the Sports Guy's love letter to KG is a sobering reminder of what a joy it was to watch him play for the Wolves. However, I think Simmons missed an opportunity to pay tribute to the Celtics true MVP this year: Kevin McHale.

Denver Post Column on the Minnesota Wild
Personally, I loved this column. Think about it: when was the last time Minnesota had a professional sports team that had a reputation for being tough? The 60s? I find it comforting that others view the Wild as a tough team willing to muscle their way to victory. Plus, think of all the shots this leaves open to take on the Avalanche. I think my colleague Licia summed it up best: "If they don't want to get hit then they shouldn't play hockey. Maybe they could play ladies rules against the Canadian women's team, that might be more their speed." Ouch.

Survival of the Richest
Normally I don't agree with Kiyosaki's columns, but this one is a reasonably concise explanation of why the Fed bailout of Bear Stearns was such an unbelievable move. Worth at least a quick read.

The Next Five Years
An interesting blog post I stumbled upon about Eric Case quitting the Blogger team and moving on to other adventures. A good reminder that no matter how comfortable things get, it's OK to keep your eye on the horizon and follow your heart.

So THAT'S why the Wolves Suck
It all seems so simple: the Wolves have terrible players. Why does Kevin McHale still have a job? Why?

Seriously, why?

Financial Inequality in 2008
It's unreal how much greed can continue to exist despite all of the troubles faced by the middle and working classes over the past decades. Don't forget, if you think you're rich, you're not. Remember this in November.

Happy reading everybody and get ready to enjoy a spectacular year for the NBA playoffs!

A Poetic Finish

2008-04-12T23:14:00.002-05:00

Every so often, we get reminded why some flaws are referred to as "fatal;" we get reminded that a critical weakness can rise up and snatch defeat from the claws of victory, leave us confused and despondent and wondering what went wrong, how we blew our chance at glory.

Last Monday night, the Memphis Tigers showed us all how fatal a single flaw can be.

Coming into the tournament, Memphis was widely considered one of the most talented teams in the country. They spent the season utterly dominating their opposition: UConn by 11, Arkansas State by 21, Marshall by 23, and on and on. Led by All-American Chris Douglas-Roberts, outstanding freshman Derrick Rose, and senior Joey Dorsey, the Memphis Tigers were the complete package both offensively and defensively. They could run the fast break, score in a half court set, shot the three well, could defend teams that scored from both the guard and post positions, and rarely made mistakes or turnovers that cost them games. On the eve of March Madness, the Tigers appeared to be an invincible juggernaut destined to make NCAA history as the winningest team of all time.

But...

During the season, Memphis had revealed a critical weakness: their ability to make free throws. In fact, Memphis ranked 329th out of 341 teams in their statistical ability to cash in at the charity stripe, converting only 61.3% of their attempts throughout the season. While it is not unusual to see players, especially more defensive minded centers and forwards, shoot this bad of an individual percentage, for a team of Memphis' stature to shoot this bad collectively is truly a staggering display of lapsed concentration. To put this in perspective, the Tigers shot less than 15% worse from the field, when the other team was allowed to play defense!

Many speculated that free throw shooting would be the undoing of the Memphis Tigers in the Tournament, but much to the critics chagrin, the team seemed to miraculously reverse course. 74% against Michigan State. 83% against Texas. 87% against UCLA. By all appearances, Memphis had found their stroke from the free-throw line at precisely the right time. Some said they had heard their critics and were rising to answer them, others that the magnitude of the event was causing the Memphis players to perform at a higher level. Regardless of the explanation, all considered the Tigers' free-throw dilemma solved and predicted a national championship and a place in the record books. But as Galadriel once said, they were all of them, deceived...

As the final game against the Jayhawks of Kansas stretched on, Memphis found themselves up by nine points with approximately 2 minutes to play, victory seemingly assured if they could hit their free-throws and crush any hope of a comeback left in the Kansas players. It was at this moment that the basketball gods turned their back on the Tigers, abandoned them to fend for themselves, and trip after trip to the line was met with a resounding *clank*. Taunted and tormented, the Memphis players looked around wildly for answers, but the truth was inescapable: it was time to pay the piper for their free-throw sins that had gathered and compounded throughout the year. Like a script from Hoosiers, the Jayhawks proceeded to make a stunning comeback, capped by Mario Chalmers incredible three-pointer with virtually no time remaining. Kansas would go on to clinch the title in overtime and Memphis would be left to wonder about what went wrong and what could have been.

In hindsight, it's almost poetic how the Tigers' free-throw collapse cost them a national title. Their one Achilles heel, their inability to stop, concentrate, and execute, rose up to bite them on the biggest of all possible stages. Almost like it was fate.

Anyway, there's tons of great analysis out there for this game so I won't continue further. Hope everybody enjoyed the wild finish to a great year of March Madness!

The Night Frank's Bracket Died

2008-03-29T00:02:00.002-05:00

And I was singing
Toast, toast, my bracket is toast
I was feelin brash, talkin trash
But now I've no right to boast
It all slipped away while I watched Memphis coast
Sayin oh my gosh my bracket is toast
Oh my gosh my bracket is toast

And just like that, my hopes of a respectable finish in my various pools slipped away as Kansas and Memphis advanced into the Elite Eight. Memphis simply took the wood to Michigan State in the first half, leading by 30 at the half. Some thoughts from tonight.

Just like Georgetown, Wisconsin was significantly bigger than Davidson on the block yet, bafflingly, couldn't get much scoring production down low (Stiemsma, Butch, and Landry were a combined 6 of 16 for the game). Whatever Davidson is doing to keep their opponents bigs from scoring in the paint, let's hope they can find a way to keep it up against Kansas.
If the T-Wolves by some miracle end up with the first or second pick of the draft, they should take Derrick Rose over Michael Beasley. I just don't see Beasley complementing Jefferson very well and Rose would be a beast in the backcourt with Foye and Brewer, with McCants coming off the bench for scoring. So a starting lineup of Jefferson, Foye, Rose, Brewer, and a more defensive minded F/C. That starts to sound promising...
Glen Dorsey is a chump. Only a chump would trash talk a guard after an open court dunk in a game where his team is leading by 20+.
I can admit it, I was completely wrong about my prediction that Wisconsin would make the Final Four.
Brook Lopez had a pretty good game tonight even though Stanford lost. Get ready for the local papers to hype him up when the Wolves miss out on Beasley & Rose and end up taking Lopez with the third pick. (Frank slams head into wall)

Anyway, a disappointing night of blowouts. Rory is back in town from Iraq so the Caboose & I are driving to Marshfield tomorrow to visit for his welcome back party. Be sure to check out his blog (Duty, Honor, Country) for some of his tales from the front.

Thursday Tournament Observations

2008-03-27T22:10:00.002-05:00

Some thoughts while watching basketball and recovering from my own craptacular performance on the court tonight:

North Carolina is good. Like, really good.
Kevin Love is this year's Sean May. Look out for the man-child over the next two weeks.
Josh Ship's confidence is shot. He's passing up shots he would normally take...and make. If UCLA is going to win this thing, they need him to play well.
The big winner from last weekend's games was Wisconsin. Tomorrow they get to play Davidson instead of Georgetown and then (if they win) get to play perennial choke artist Kansas. Pencil the Badgers in for the Final Four.
Drew Lavender's ankle seems healed. Xavior could be a pretty tough match up for UCLA.
If Louisville shot better from the charity stripe, I would take them over North Carolina. But they don't, so I won't.
Darren Collison scored 4 points against Western Kentucky. That's right, the all-american scored 4 against a 12 seed.
March Madness in HD is the greatest idea ever.

Hopefully Friday is just as much fun!

Scotch, Ham, and Broken Brackets

2008-03-24T01:01:00.002-05:00

Some people cannot imagine enjoying a football game without cold beer. Others cannot imagine taking in an afternoon baseball game without a hot dog with all the fixins. In much the same way, I cannot imagine watching the first round of the NCAA Tournament without a fine single malt scotch on hand. There's something about the smoky sophistication and slow, savored sipping of scotch that seems to pair well with way Tournament games gradually build in intensity before their frenzied finish.

On that note, this weekend certainly saw its fair share of frenzied finishes and left many of us staring at the shattered remnants of our broken brackets, wondering just what had happened and how were we supposed to feel about all this? Some of the big events of the weekend:

1. Georgetown is upset by Davidson. Simply unreal. I've probably watched Georgetown more than any other team this year and have seen them win close game after close game in the uber-competitive Big East, gritting out wins on the road at Marquette and Villanova. Not only is this team talented and well coached, throughout the year they have been lucky, a trait that is imperative to have if you hope to make it far in the tournament (see UCLA for another lucky team). I'm speechless that Georgetown lost to Davidson, just speechless. Of all the power teams coming into the Tournament, they seemed to have the easiest path to the Final Four, their only serious obstacle being perennial choke artist Kansas. The only upside of this loss is that it likely ends any chance that Georgetown's Roy Hibbert ends up as a lottery pick, and makes the nightmare I had a few months ago about Kevin McHale drafting Roy Hibbert #1 overall an almost impossible scenario. Almost...

2. Stanford comes through in the clutch. Like Kansas, Stanford is a club that regularly finds a way to choke spectacularly in the NCAA Tournament. Imagine my confidence watching this game with my uncle Bill (who had picked Stanford to win) as Marquette scored to take the lead in OT and Stanford prepared to inbound the ball with less than 10 seconds on the clock. I thought I had this one in the bag. But no, Stanford kicks the ball down low to Brook Lopez who hits a one-handed, fade-away hook shot while spinning towards the baseline over an outstretched defender with one second on the clock. Seriously? Brook Lopez comes up with a clutch one-handed, fade-away hook shot while spinning towards the baseline over an outstretched defender with one second on the clock to win the game? That's how Stanford stays in the tournament? If Georgetown hadn't found a way to blow an 11 point half-time lead, this would have been #1 by a long shot.

3. UConn and Drake both bow out in round 1. How many people had Western Kentucky playing San Diego to make the Sweet 16? Seven? Eight? People will discover Jimmy Hoffa's body and the secret to cold fusion before you find somebody that picked that match up. That's what March Madness is all about!

4. Clemson and Vanderbilt go home early. How quickly the mighty fall. Not a week ago, Clemson was giving North Carolina all they could handle in the ACC Tournament championship and Vanderbilt was coming into the Tournament after a solid SEC season. Both get bounced in the first round by Villanova and Siena. You think maybe the ACC and SEC weren't as good this year?

5. Duke spends another April going to class instead of going to the hole. Is there any sight in sport more satisfying that watching Duke lose? I submit that there is not. Not even the Yankees can touch the Blue Devils for smug arrogance. The funny thing is that everybody seems to understand and feel the same way about this without even talking about it before hand. It's a primal desire of human nature to see hubris laid low by an underdog, to see the powerful and tyrannous humbled by ordinary mortals. Ahh the satisfaction.

And as I think about the warm satisfaction Duke's loss gave me, it seems like a good place to end this post. As always, the first round of the NCAA Tournament delivered thrills like no other event and time of the year, I hope everybody had a chance to enjoy it!

Return of the Shaq

2008-03-23T13:32:00.002-05:00

After winning their seventh game in a row last night, I think it is safe to say the Shaquille O'Neal trade is working out for the Phoenix Suns.

The trade has been analyzed every which way, with proponents and opponents either praising or criticizing Steve Kerr for making such a bold move. Despite all of this analysis, the bottom line seems obvious to me: no matter how great a player Shawn Marion might be, trading for Shaq allows the Suns to compete and win against teams that like to ugly the game up with physical defense and post play, teams such as San Antonio and Dallas, who have combined to eliminate the Suns from the playoffs the past three years.

Good to see Shaq, one of my favorite players, experiencing a second renaissance in Phoenix.

Sleuthing the Slowdown

2008-03-23T11:37:00.002-05:00

Today's New York Times has a fascinating article detailing some of the more nuanced questions concerning the recent purchase of Bear Stearns by JP Morgan Chase. Of course, what remains so fascinating about all of this is that we have been through similar economic situations before, yet nobody seems to learn from their past mistakes! The media does not seem optimistic about the prospects of people learning from this round of trouble.

With the amount of uncertainty still left in the market and the slow pace that this uncertainty is being wrung out, I think it will likely be an economically frosty 2009. Let's just hope we do not start to have runs on banks and serious employment problems, as those will truly be signs of a crisis beyond control.

Grab those profits while you can and wait for the dust to settle folks!

Lost in the Maddness

2008-03-22T21:33:00.002-05:00

It's the most wonderful time of the year
Where there's vicious rebounding
The shots are astounding
And we all get to cheer!
It's the most, wonderful time, of the year!

March in Minnesota is a tough time. As I recently heard Garrison Keillor describe it, "March is God's way of showing people who don't drink what a hangover feels like." The streets are sloppy and obnoxious to drive on. Melting snow reveals the trash and debris that has been deposited into snow banks throughout the winter and must now be picked up. The sky teases with days of sunshine and warmth, then cruelly returns us to blizzards and freezing rain at the drop of the hat. In this land of gray bleakness and false springs, it's easy to feel as if all hope is lost, that the ring has been returned to Sauron, that the Death Star has destroyed the rebel base on Yavin IV, that Betamax has rendered all of your precious VHS tapes worthless. In short, everything is wrong in the world and there is little hope it will be made right.

It is no coincidence, in my opinion, that the powers that be picked this most hopeless time of year, as season of frayed nerves and tears, to host the most splendid celebration of western civilization, the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament.

Endless word's have been written about the splendors of the NCAA Tournament, all of them letters of love to the basketball gods thanking them for such a display. There's no doubt the unique structure of the Tournament, a one-and-done fest of the nation's best teams, attracts many admirers, myself among them. Thought I would take a quick moment to jot down some of the things I love most about the Tournament.

1. Everything changes as the tournament progresses. One of the best parts of March Madness is that the way you feel about a team is in constant flux based on what else is going on in the Tournament. You might love Texas against a smaller, quicker team like Marquette, but how will they hold up against the low-post power of Stanford? Georgetown might seem an obvious match up nightmare for a smaller, more one-dimensional team like Kansas State, but how will they fare against the tall, deep squad from Wisconsin? This constant state of flux fascinates and frustrates and makes it so every round, every game is a must see just because you have no idea what will happen.

2. It's a family affair. I realized yesterday that this is the first time in over a year that I have eaten two evening meals in row that were not cooked by me and did not involve fast food or a restaurant. I'm not kidding, this is why I love March Madness. Every March, my dad and I spend a solid 4 days screaming at the television while Mom whips up delicious, ingenious food hour after hour. It completely amazes me the kind of creativity she can show in a simple food like quesadillas or pizza. Dad gets more animated at sports than any other time of the year, and I just feed off his energy taking our enjoyment of the game to a new level with each passing night. Caboose gets involved with sports in a way he usually doesn't, coming down to shout at the television and whoop in celebration as Duke gets bounced from the Tournament. All of this blends into four solid days bonding with my family, whom I love and admire tremendously.

3. Bonding with coworkers. Personally, I love all the press about companies losing billions in productivity every year because of March Madness. I love it because it means employees would rather focus on bonding with each other in the celebration of competition than concentrate on the daily grind. It's an affirmation that, no matter how materialistic and shallow our culture might become, people still have enough sense to focus on an event that celebrates powerful human emotions at their most basic and raw: losing and winning, humiliation and celebration, failure and triumph.

4. Kids become heros. As many of the NCAA commercials hammer home, most of the kids that play in the Tournament will never play professionally. For most of them, this will be the biggest stage they will ever play on, and for the seniors, it will be the time they get to lace em up and hit the hardwoods. And for some lucky few, they will get to be their school's hero for a day, a shining example of ordinary people doing extraordinary things.

5. Gus Johnson. Most of the year, we are tortured by horrendous sports announcing. Just think of the travesties unleashed upon us by John Madden, Al Michaels, and the other major announcers throughout the NFL season and the overall poor color commentating that goes on throughout the NBA season. Amidst this steady stream of mediocrity stands out Gus Johnson, the finest color commentator on television today, and a professional at his finest during March Madness. Watch this clip and tell me you don't get fired up.

So there you have it, my top five for the NCAA Tournament. Hopefully this marks the return of regular posts to Minnesotan on the Loose!

No More Boston Whining

2007-10-23T19:30:00.000-05:00

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/recap?gameId=271021015

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/recap?gameId=271021102

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/070730

I never want to hear a Boston fan of any kind complain about living in a "tortured sports city." Never. Do you understand me? Never.

State of the Minnesota Sports Scene

2007-10-18T21:20:00.000-05:00

Here we are, 11 days from what I traditionally consider to be the peak of the sports season. The college football world is over the mid-point of its season and racing toward the bowl series and recruiting drama. The NFL season is in full swing, dominating Sportscenter even on nights when no games are played. Universities around the countries are hosting "Midnight Madness" to kick off their respective college basketball seasons. And in 11 days, the coux de gras, at least for me - the NBA season gets underway. Let's take a brief moment to examine the state of Minnesota sports at this, the high point of the sporting season.

1. Minnesota Golden Gophers - College Football. The one team I truly bleed for, the Gophers have had what can generously be described as a disappointing season thus far. Losses to Bowling Green, Florida Atlantic, Indiana, and Northwestern have deflated the enthusiasm and support new head coach Tim Brewster had built heading into the system, exposing his coaching staff and team for what they are: inexperienced and out gunned. Redshirt freshman quarterback Adam Weber has shown potential and with the proper athletes, the defensive schemes should prove to be much more effective, but the seniors on this team, especially Amir Pinnix, Ernie Wheelwright, John Shevlin, and Jamal Harris have done a poor job leading by example in their final year as Gophers.

Ironically, the Gophers still could sweep their rivalry games this year as Michigan, Wisconsin, and Iowa have all competed with Minnesota weekly on who could be the most embarrassing Big Ten program of the moment. The team's biggest problem remains team speed on the defensive side of the ball, undoubtedly the first thing Brewster will need to address through recruiting to make this team competitive again.

2. Minnesota Vikings - NFL. This year's Viking's team, in my opinion, has underperformed as well, though not as badly as my beloved Gophers. The Vikings, for the first time in a decade, made a good decision with their first round draft pick and now sport one of the most productive and exciting rookies in the league this year, Adrian Peterson. I'm still shocked he fell to us at pick #7 and convinced the only reason he did was because of his collarbone injury during his Junior year. Barring that injury, he goes #1 in my mind, without doubt. But even with this stud new runner, the Vikings are a bumbling 2-3.

The team's defense is certainly good enough to win with, though the pass defense can be exposed (can you say Dwayne Bowe?). Quarterback and wide receiver remain the Viking's two weakest positions, though Sidney Rice is beginning to show potential. Unfortunately, you cannot consistently win in the NFL without solid quarterback play, and Tavaris Jackson has not shown the ability to lead the team in pressure situations. With an upgrade at quarterback, this team is ready to contend.

3. Minnesota Golden Gophers - College Basketball. The Gophers b-ball team made a big splash following the NCAA Tournament by hiring coach Tubby Smith away from the Kentucky Wildcats, a perennial superpower in the college basketball world. Tubby has already picked a couple of solid commitments for the 2008 season, but the roster for the 2007 season does not lend much optimism for the Gophers' Big Ten campaign. Dan Coleman is a hard worker and fun player to watch and Spencer Tollackson is a steady performer, though a bit of an underachiever considering is ballyhooed recruitment.

There's no doubt about it, it will take time to repair the damage Dan Monson's ineptitude did to this program, but I expect them to content for the Big Ten title in the next two to three years.

4. Minnesota Timberwolves - NBA. At last we come to the biggest enigma of the Minnesota sports scene, the Timberwolves. I know the S ports Guy has been geeking out about the Celtics acquiring Garnett from the Wolves and thinks they got the better end of that deal. I know Marc Stein has the Wolves last in his pre-season power rankings because of the Garnett trade. I know every Minnesotan is upset that Garnett is gone and feels an overwhelming sense of hopelessness about the season. But let's face some realities:

This team wasn't getting any younger. Garnett will be 31, Trenton Hassell will be 28, Mike James will be 32, Ricky Davis will be 28, and none of them were performing at their peak.
They couldn't contend in the west. The Wolves, as they existed last year, couldn't beat the premier teams in the league, who all just happen to play in their conference. They simply stood no chance against San Antonio, Dallas, Phoenix, Utah, and Houston, and barring a blockbuster trade, that wasn't likely to change for a very long time.
Garnett would have left anyway. KG only had 2 years left on his contract when he was traded and has an option to opt-out of this next year and enter free agency early. Since he entered the league, the Big Ticket has made approximately $200 million, which means money is clearly not a factor in where he chooses to play. Garnett has never won an NBA championship and has only played for one Wolves team, the 2004 team, that seriously contended and it is well established he wants to win a ring before retiring. All this adds up to a scenario where, if he had not been traded, Garnett would have left Minnesota anyway, its just that the Wolves would have received nothing in return.
The players the Wolves received are decent. Al Jefferson will be a solid player for the next 10 years and is improving by leaps and bounds every year. Gerald Green is an explosive player and will make a capable backup at the swing position for the next few years. Furthermore, the sheer number of players acquired gives the Wolves flexibility to make trades for players that can help them win now.

The most exciting part of the trade for the Wolves is that they have now assembled a nucleus of talented young players at a variety of positions in Randy Foye, Al Jefferson, and Corey Brewer. These three blue chippers will provide the foundation the Wolves can build on over the next few years and should prove to be a good core to start with. The only part of the situation I haven't been able to figure out is why Kevin McHale hasn't traded his excess players and Ricky Davis to Memphis for Pau Gasol, he would be a perfect fit for this team and would make them contenders much faster. (this is the moment where I realize the Wolves are still run by Kevin McHale....and grind the palms of my hands into my eye sockets in frustration)

*sigh*

No doubt about it, these are trying times for the Minnesota sports faithful. Hopefully things will improve.

Logan Pass Training Session

2007-09-10T20:03:00.000-05:00

(Note: This entry describes the events of July 27th, 2007)

“I never cared for Browning” Dad remarked as we zipped past a series of shuttered businesses, “the town kinda scares me. I considered taking the train here until I read in the paper that a man was brutally murdered in the street; thought we might want to avoid that.” From the looks of things, I had to agree with Dad that we were better off taking our chances with the grizzly bears of Glacier than with the residents of Browning, and shifted my gaze from the depressing surroundings to the approaching mountain horizon. Glacier National Park, the crown of the continent

We made our way up Highway 89 to the Saint Mary entrance of Glacier, familiarizing ourselves with the park at the large Ranger Station/Visitor Center located there. Already late in the morning, our plan was to secure a site in one of the local camp grounds and complete a day hike or two to get our legs used to the trail. Obviously, to make any kind of hiking possible, we would need fuel, and after making camp at the nearby Rising Sun campground, we exited the park and lunched up at the Park Café. Little did we know what a prominent role the café would play during our time out west.

Recharged with hamburgers and late-morning pancakes, we decided to tackle Logan Pass and the corresponding hike to Hidden Lake. To reach the pass, we drove Going to the Sun road, the famous highway that bisects Glacier Park and provides dramatic views of the parks mountains, valleys, and wildlife. Arriving at Logan Pass, we scoured the packed parking lot for a place to store the Impala, finally finding a spot relatively close to the visitor center and trailhead. Our packs flung over our shoulders, Dad and I eagerly trotted over to the beginning of the trail and our first hiking adventure in Glacier was underway.

Logan Pass is a relatively easy hike, designed to be accessible to a wide variety of visitors with a sturdily constructed boardwalk path for the approach to the pass. Following the boardwalk is a heavily-used trail leading down to Hidden Lake that passes snowfields and white mountain goats. Dad and I gobbled up the boardwalk and began the descent down to the lake, making sure to drink plenty of water and cover ourselves with sun block.

The hike down was pleasant and we encountered a family that had been fishing at the lake; they boasted landing a 20 inch trout, which naturally prompted us to request photographic proof (which they had). We tackled the ascent back up to the parking lot, pacing ourselves and snapping photos along the way. We passed dozens and dozens of tourists, many sporting expensive camera hardware; Dad and I figured we walked by at least $100K in camera equipment on the trail.

Back at the visitor center, we purchased postcards to write home before hopping in the car and returning to camp. Figuring it would be best to conserve our freeze-dried meals for the trail and longing for civilized food, Dad and I opted to visit the Park Café a second time, savoring a sort of last meal before diving into the back country.

Back at camp, I made note of the time and borrowed the car to make a quick attempt at a sunset picture from the Goose Island lookout point, a rather scenic point we had passed earlier in the day with framed views of Saint Mary Lake and its surrounding mountains. At the Point, several serious photographers were gathered, appreciating the sunset, examining each others’ gear, and engaging each other in a lively round of the now age-old debate in photography, “film vs. digital.” It was very entertaining listening to these Ansel Adams wannabes having at it and learning a bit about their techniques. The sunset was magnificent, well worth my trip up. In fact, I would later find out that smoke ruined the view from that spot every night Dad and I were in the park, making it a lucky coincidence I had picked that night to claim my shot.

Train in the Distance

2007-09-09T22:10:00.000-05:00

(Note: This entry describes the events of July 25, 2007)

Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance
Everybody thinks it’s true

As I sat waiting for mechanical carriage that would sweep me up and whisk me westward to fun and adventure, the Paul Simon song ran steadily through my head. This was only the second long train ride of my lifetime, and my first experience riding the rails through the American west. While traversing the countryside behind a locomotive is no longer the glamour activity it once was, it remains a more cost effective mode of transport than airplanes when visiting northern Montana and is much less tiring/stressful than driving long distances over the plains.

We boarded the train in the dead of night in St. Cloud, Minnesota, a confusing experience because of the poor signage found at the station and the mute nature of the station’s employees. Dad and I amused ourselves talking to fellow travelers and debating which side of the station we were supposed to park on. Eventually, like a vision from a gritty sci-fi novel, the Amtrak train rolled through the station and greeted us its mechanical whirs and whooshes (If you’ve ever ridden Amtrak, you know it looks like something straight out of Blade Runner, at least from the outside). Once on board, we hurriedly found our seats and did our best to securely store our gear, squeezing and cramming our bags into racks and overhead compartments. Our moment of panic over, Dad and I settled into our seats and did our best to doze and rest. The train rolled steadily westward, rocking us to a fitful night of sleep on the Great Plains of America.

The next day, I passed the time in the lounge car reading books and writing notes in my journal and on the laptop. Dad and I munched on Pop-Tarts and apples and sipped coffee from the lounge car, enjoying the views out the floor to ceiling windows. One of the great advantages to rail travel is time. Time to catch up on all the reading and written correspondence that ordinarily gets brushed aside. Time to really think about what you want to write, what you want to say. Time to think about what you are reading and really savor the experience. Seemingly endless time.

Eventually, we began to long for the solidness of real ground beneath our feet and began tracking our progress with my GPS, anxiously anticipating our arrival in Cut Bank, Montana. Before too long, the tiny screen of my GPS revealed Cut Bank approximately 45 miles away, and before we knew it, Dad and I were grabbing our gear, leaping out the door, waving goodbye to the conductors, and making our way over to the blue Chevy Impala rental that would serve as our base of operations for the next two weeks.

A gritty oil town on the American frontier, Cut Bank is bisected by two prominent roads: Main St. and Central Ave., making it an easy place to navigate, even for first-time visitors. Dad and I found our hotel, prominently marked with a gigantic penguin, and made final preparations for our drive into the park the following morning. Our adventure had begun.

Glacier Blog Series

2007-09-09T22:05:00.000-05:00

Starting today, I will begin posting my Glacier blog series. This series will detail Dad and my trip to Glacier, Montana that occurred from July 25th to August 6th. I plan to post one new entry each day for the next 13 days, at which time Minnesotan on the Loose will revert back to its usual inconsistent-ramblings.

Photos from our trip can be found here.

Enjoy!

Learning About Family

2007-07-22T00:10:00.000-05:00

The memory of my grandfather that stands out most in my mind is from my family’s trip to a resort in northern Minnesota when I was five years old named Vacation Air. Located near my family’s traditional homeland in Minnesota, Wauben and the surrounding lakes, hills, fields, and forests, the resort was the scene of two consecutive family trips, once when I was five and again when I was six. Acting as a surrogate base-camp within our family fiefdom, Vacation Air allowed us to express our love of Minnesota at its most basic and elemental, letting each of us revel in the heritage and history the surrounding area imbued and infused within us in a way no other Earthly locale ever could.

In amongst the 12-foot Lunds and Alumacrafts that composed the majority of Vacation Air’s sturdy fishing fleet was an old pontoon boat, a vessel that had obviously seen better days yet remained an exotic carriage to adventure to a five year old boy from the cities with the blood of the north woods in his veins. The boat was docked on a long pier located at the bottom of a steep hill near the resort’s main lodge, making it a challenging destination for the elderly or persons of limited mobility and undoubtedly reducing its attractiveness to potential renters. I thought it was best boat I had ever seen.

During our first day at the resort, we had scoured the lake with Grampa’s Lowrance Fish Lo-K-Tor and trawling lures in search of big fish with little success. From my previous experience fishing with my dad, uncles, and grandfather, I knew that finding the fish was the most important step in catching them. If you could find the fish, I was taught, there was a good chance you could catch ‘em, but if you couldn’t find ‘em, you had no shot at all. Little did I know at the time how many things in life this basic logic would apply to.

On the morning of our second day at the resort, I went down to the pontoon to play and imagine myself to be some great captain or explorer doing as I pleased all around the lake. While playing, I happened to duck my head under the deck of the pontoon, curious about what mysterious unknowns resided under such a vehicle and to my amazement, my eyes spied dozens and dozens of large fish! Though I did not know it at the time, these “large” fish were not really large at all, mostly sunfish, crappies, and large rock bass, but scales are different to the young than they are to the old and at the time they seemed like prizes worthy of at least attempting a catch.

Excited by my discovery, I sprinted for our cabin and immediately located Grampa. I implored him to come down to the pontoon and see the stock of large fish I had located, absolutely certain that I had located this lake’s secret hiding hole and beaming with pride at my ability to accomplish what my uncles, grandfather, and father had not.

Grampa grabbed his hat and sunglasses and followed me over to the resort’s lodge, down the steep hill to the lake, out onto the dock and onto the pontoon. He got down on his hands and knees and gazed under the pontoon with me, marveling at all the fish under the boat and noting several times what a good job I had done finding the fish. We discussed methods and tactics we could use to catch these tricky fish that had decided to hide under the boat, but thought we should probably have lunch first before getting started on fishing. Mission accomplished, we headed back onto dry land triumphant and started back towards our cabin.

Just after getting off the dock, my dad, who was standing near the resort lodge, called me over to him. I ran to him and explained excitedly how I had found fish under the pontoon and how Grampa and I were going to catch them. Dad said that was great I had found fish under the pontoon, but I should realize how lucky I was. Grampa, he explained, had a difficult time getting up and down hills and would not have gone down to the pontoon for anybody else. He said I should be sure to thank my grandfather.

That was the moment in my life I realized what family was. Up until then, every day of my life, I had taken for granted that my family did what asked as a matter of course. It wasn’t that anybody was taking me into special consideration or making a special effort for me, it was just the way things were. With those words, I realized that my Grampa was willing to do things for me that he would do for no one else, that he would go to lengths for me because I was his grandson, because I was of his blood, that he would not even consider for others. It seems like a small thing in retrospect, but to a five year old, it was a shocking revelation of what family was, what family really meant, and a moment I remember vividly to this day.

My grandfather died on Sunday, July 14^th at the age of 82. He loved to hunt, fish, talk politics, and most of all, tell stories. He taught me how to fish, how to debate, how to take down “Harvard MBAs,” how to avoid “dumb bohemies,” and most importantly, what it meant to be family. My grandfather lived a long, good life and fought a good fight for a long time; I am honored to have known him, to have lived with him, and to be of his blood.

Old Friends

2007-05-06T22:13:00.000-05:00

Old friends. When I’m swallowed up in the deepest depths of sorrow, nothing makes me feel better than seeing old friends; people who have treated me with kindness and affection and who I admire for that. It’s a reassurance that I’m not such a monster after all; that I’m not so impossible to love.

I drove down to the Minneapolis Convention Center this morning to watch my former students dance and compete. Former – what a funny word to use. I say former because I am no longer actively teaching at Fusion Dance, but I still feel intimately attached to them all. I think anybody that has spent any time teaching understands what I’m talking about; that you never really stop being interested in your students, their progress, how their lives are unfolding…and that somehow you are intimately and inescapably wrapped into their lives whether you are there or not. It’s a strange sensation.

One of the things I have always admired about Fusion Dance, the thing that kept me driving an hour each way at 1 AM to be apart of, is that the parents and families of the studio are some of the most decent, kind, and earnest people I have found. To be sure, they have their failings as all humans do, but their decency as a whole always impresses and moves me. I have never spent time with a group of people that have made me feel more welcome and admired, even after I was no longer teaching their children. It’s unreal.

I can’t really relate how much I’ve missed working at Fusion. Driving to Red Wing daily or weekly, realistically, is completely incompatible with my current life, which is why I gave up working there and focused on other endeavors But when I worked there, I always felt like I was apart of something good; like I was doing good work. Seeing them all today reminded me of all the good times I had working there, all the successes and failures, all the tough times and triumphs. Moreover, it reminded me of these parents’ unyielding commitment to their children and their young lives; all the long hours they spend working, driving, and watching and the affection they show the people who help them make their kids’ lives a bit better.

The parents and kids were deliriously happy to see me today, almost embarrassingly so, but it felt refreshing and reassuring to be around people that cared for me and how I was doing. All of their numbers and routines looked terrific, most of the kids have made pretty significant progress over the past year, but they continue to play the role of the small fish in the big pond. Granted, they are a very good small fish, but it’s amazing how uniformly high quality the Minneapolis dance scene has become.

Seeing everyone from Red Wing was remarkably refreshing and reminded me of everything I love about being involved with the dance community. It also reminded me how good it feels to be around old friends and how it can make it seem like everything is going to be alright, even if only for a little while.

I'm Alive

2007-04-23T17:55:00.000-05:00

It’s been a long time since I’ve watched these lights alone
I look around my life tonight and you are gone
I might have done something to keep you if I’d known
How unhappy you had become

The day I have been dreading for months and months has finally come. The day I have worried myself sick over, searched my soul for, and argued my hardest against has arrived and I have ultimately been proven powerless to stop it.

Today, my beautiful girl walked out of my world, taking with her everything I had hoped and dreamed for in this life.

While I was dreaming of you
With my heart in your hands
And I was following through
With my beautiful plans

The reasons she left are complex, and it wouldn’t be appropriate to share the details. Ultimately, Megan decided that she couldn’t be fully committed to our relationship in the way that I needed her to be and struck out on her own for whatever lies over the horizon. I can appreciate what she’s going through; the urge to run, to be free, to revel in the whimsical and pleasurable rather than sacrificing for a better tomorrow. I can appreciate her circumstance because I have the same urges.

I can appreciate and understand, but relationships, at their core, are about loyalty and commitment, and if she can’t stand beside me in the tough times as well as the good, how can I build a future with her? How can we build a life together if I cannot depend on her when things are rough going? In the end, I can’t. So there’s the rub.

I want to go where I will never hear your name
I want to lose my sorrow and be free again
And I know I’ve been insane
When I think of the places I could have been

I’ve been through breakups before, too many if you want my opinion about it, so this shouldn’t be new territory. But this one hurts like nothing I’ve ever experienced; it churns up my insides like a Kitchen-Aide mixer and plays with my emotions like a sick kid plays with a bug just before squishing it. I’ve thought and thought about why this separation punishes me so acutely and what I’ve come up with is that I had really bought in to my relationship with Megan. Whether I talked about it or not, I really thought she was the one and that we had a bright future in front of us, and I feel cheated to have that taken from me; to have it stolen right out of my hands.

Looking up and down this road
I’ve been here before
Can’t be here no more

Is this the end of Megan and I forever? Who knows, anything’s possible, but it certainly feels that way. In the end, I guess I don’t have much choice but to do what I’ve always done: wake up tomorrow and live it the best way I can. What other options are there? Not many (at least not many good ones). I do take solace in the fact that I gave Megan and my relationship with her literally everything I had; the problem was that I failed, not that I didn’t try, and I believe there is nobility in that. There’s a big part of me that will never really be over her, I don’t think I could claim to have ever loved her if there wasn’t, but I’m still me and I still have hope. I’ll be fine eventually…

…but it still hurts. So for now, I’m going to mourn the death of what could have been, the death of my life with my beautiful Snuggs, and think about what new dreams will replace the old.

Hey look at the way I believed in you
And loved you all these years
Now you can fill a swimming pool
With all my salted tears
If you’d have told me what was in your heart
Instead of all your lies
I thought that it would kill me
But I’m alive

Yeah, I’m alive.

Thoughts from a Night of B-Ball

2007-03-31T21:21:00.000-05:00

Ahh, the NCAA Tournament.

This really has been a good one, hasn't it? Sure, there haven't been many upsets, but that just means that the best teams are playing each other at the end. Only part-time fans crave upsets, true aficionados crave to see the best play the best.

Anyway, as I sit here watching Florida dismantle UCLA, I've been pondering the following questions:

Has a team ever owned another more than Florida owns UCLA? Two years in a row the same Gators team has completely dominated the same UCLA team. The only two-team series that I can think of that rivals this level of domination are the Bills/Cowboys Superbowls of the early 90s. Seriously, it's impressive.
Will Greg Oden return for his sophomore year? Reading this article tonight, I can see the benefits, but there are so much incentives (like financial security for the rest of your life) to turn pro that it would be hard to imagine him coming back. If OSU wins it all, I guaranty he turns pro and goes #1.
Who emerges from the tournament as the team to beat next year? Depending on who decides to turn pro, my money is on UCLA. They have the #1 recruit in the country showing up at their doorsteps next year and Collison/Afflalo will remain a deadly duo...as long as they don't play Florida.
Who will end up the best pro of this years stars? The safe money is on Durant, but it could depend on what team they go to. Jeff Green has a chance to be a real impact player for whatever team gets him in the 7-8 range and my personal favorite, Julian Wright, is like a reincarnated James Worthy. Regardless, it's going to be a good draft class.

I know, the thoughts of the sports obsessed. A few additional thoughts from the tourney:

My colleague Tracy successfully derailed my mojo and ruined my chances at the office pool. Next year I'm going to make a voodoo doll of him in advance just in case he tries the same tricks.
Texas A&M, my sleeper pick to make the Final Four, was completely robbed at the end of their game against Memphis. Completely. My only explanation is that the refs in the game were auditioning for a chance to guest-ref the NBA Finals this year. Unbelievable; I thought I was going to have a seizure.
This has been the best-fed I've been in awhile. Most of Tournament I've been going out to Brooklyn Park to watch the games with my dad, and Mom has been cooking up my favorites while I've been out. Lasagna. Ginger Chicken with fried rice. Life has been good.
During this tourney run, Dad, Drew, and I have been on a scotch run of epic proportions. For some reason, basketball becomes even more enjoyable with a glass of 12-year in hand.
My favorite moment of the tournament (me screaming at my brother, as he's sitting next to his girlfriend, after he commented on a deck of cards that came with a bottle of Speyside 12-year I had bought):
That's right! That's why you drink scotch! You don't get that s#!t with Miller Lite!
They've always let me down when I've picked them. Everybody advised me not to pick them. I wrote I wasn't going to pick them...and I still picked Kansas to win it all. I'm an idiot.

At this point the Gators have successfully polished off the Bruins and we are set for Ohio State vs. Florida Part Deux: This Time, it's Basketball! Hope everybody has been enjoying the tourney as much as me.

On a final note, please check out Rory's blog when you get a chance. He's been reporting from Iraq and has had some interesting postings as of late. And always, please keep him in your thoughts and prayers, no matter what faith you may be of.

Feelin the Madness

2007-03-01T20:14:00.000-06:00

Today, we officially flipped the calendar into March, which means that we are only a few short weeks away from the most wonderful time of the year...

March Madness!!! (that's right, triple exclamation mark!)

In just 14 short days, we get to revel in the collective joy of one of the five greatest sporting days of the year: the first day of the NCAA Division I Men's Basketball Championship. Frantically filling out brackets. Pressing *refresh* a thousand times at work to see who won the 5-12 match up (historically renowned for upsets). Screaming across the office at your colleagues about a photo finish. Racing home to watch the the last games and going to bed giddy to watch Saturday's hoopfest.

Man, I'm gettin' pumped just writing about it!

Anyway, this NCAA tourney is looking to be the best in well over a decade, thanks in no-small-part to the NBA's new "year-and-a-half" rule, prohibiting high school seniors from entering the draft. There are no less than ten teams that have a legit shot at the title, TEN! That's not to say there are ten teams that conceivably win the title; practically every team in the tourney will be capable of that this year. What I mean is that there are at least a dozen that could win it and everyone would say "Of course they took it! Look at the way they played over the last month! I can't believe we didn't see that coming!"

It isn't too often we have NCAA tournaments that have that kind of depth to them. In preparation for the frantic bracket studying and filling the next week will see, I thought I'd offer my insights on my favorites to win the title.

1. Florida - Yeah, they've dropped their last three games and are being talked about in the media as "burnt out," or "unmotivated," I don't care, it's their title to lose. I watched them play Tennessee the other night with my pops, a game they ended up losing, and I couldn't believe their cardiovascular conditioning. I mean, it was the tail end of the game and Joakim Noah, a legit 7 footer, was still sprinting up and down the court for dunks, rebounds, and layups. It's possible they could get upset in the first two rounds, but if they make it deep into the tournament, the part where conditioning starts to show, look out. I guarantee you Florida is the best conditioned team in the country and will be able to get it done when it matters.

2. Texas A&M - Just lost a double OT thriller to Texas, but they have all the characteristics of a NCAA champ: great senior guard play, a respectable road record, and solid rebounders. Acie Law is playing as well as anybody in the country and has shown himself to be ridiculously clutch in the loss to Texas and an earlier win at Kansas. With so many games coming down to the wire in the tournament, I would put my money on Law and Texas A&M to pull these games out.

3. Ohio State - The #1 team in the country and the temporary hosts of one of the most heralded players in the country, Greg Oden. Ohio State, again, has great guard play and a solid road record, but Oden has not had a dominant season and a great number of their key players are freshmen, which makes me concerned about their ability to play night after night. The big question to me is, can Oden take his game to a new level in the NCAA tourney ala Sean May? If he can step up his scoring and continue to be the defensive force he has been all season, Ohio State will be nearly unstoppable.

4. Kansas - A basketball institution, the Jayhawks have one of the best forwards in the country in Julian Wright. Smart, physical, great passer; he could be the best total player in the tournament. Kansas has explosive guards and a deep bench but...The last time the Jayhawks came into the tournament highly regarded was the team featuring Drew Gooden and Kirk Heinrich that nearly lost to Holy Cross in the first round and ended up losing in the championship game (when I had picked them to win it all). I still haven't recovered from the scare they gave me in the first round and, as such, can't put them higher than fourth.

5. Texas - If Kevin Durant declares war on the college basketball world and pulls a Carmelo Anthony, they might as well hand the Longhorns the title. Seriously, the kid is unstoppable. The rest of the team is rounded out well with explosive guard play and good shot blockers and they lead the Big 12 in both free-throw shooting and three-point shooting (good stats to lead coming into March Madness).

6. UCLA - Last year's runner-up remains an incredibly talented team, and watching them take Arizona apart earlier this year was admittedly impressive (the win against Texas A&M was also solid). I haven't watched enough of their games to make an accurate forecast on UCLA, but their team is solid top to bottom. My only hesitation would be that you need equal parts talent and luck to make it through the NCAA tourney and they got LUCKY against Gonzaga last year I have a feeling they used up all their luck last year.

7. North Carolina - The dominant team in the ACC always has a shot at the title and the Tar Heels are much deeper than they were last year. My biggest hesitation in picking them to go far is that three of their players that play the biggest minutes, Wright, Ellington, and Lawson, are freshmen. My gut says that they get tired in the Sweet 16 and Hansbrough doesn't have quite enough to pull them through.

8. Wisconsin - Solid role players all around, big guys that can rebound, shot-block, and shoot threes, and one of the five best players in the country in Alando Tucker. Wisconsin also has a solid road record, including their near win at Ohio State last week. The problem is that the Badgers have started to suffer a few key injuries, including a significant injury to Butch, that could hurt them in the tournament. Depending on the bracket, I think they'll make a run to the Final Four and lose in the Semis.

9. Georgetown - They just lost a bad one to Syracuse, but it was on the road and followed an emotional win over Pitt. The Hoyas have solid inside scoring, but don't seem to have a go-to guy to pick them up when shots aren't falling. Patrick Ewing Jr. is an emotional player and seems to get the team fired up, but he doesn't quite have the talent to take over a game. Still, a 10 game win streak is no small feat at this level and if they get hot, Georgetown can hang with anyone.

10. Louisville - Not the highest rated team in the tournament, but Pitino gets his team up for March Madness. Louisville has won its last five games including wins over Marquette and Pittsburgh. I doubt they'll make it past the Sweet 16, but Pitino is a genius in the tournament and I wouldn't look them over.

Don't be fooled by these teams rankings in brackets: Memphis (haven't played a ranked team since December 20) and Pittsburgh (their best player Aaron Gray just badly sprained his ankle - I' leery of his ability to hold up through the tourney).

Suffice to say, it's looking to be a great tourney. Hope everyone is looking forward to it as much as I am and that everyone is surviving this blast of winter weather we experienced today (12 inches of snow)!

Snow Day

2007-02-25T20:58:00.000-06:00

Boy today sure was a snowy day in Minneapolis. As any Minnesotan will tell you, the beauty of a slightly sizable snow storm is that it's the perfect excuse to lay around the house, watch TV, read books, and dink around on the Internet. Today's stimulating schedule of snow-day satisfiers, at least for Megs and myself, included:

1. Shoveling. Yes, shoveling snow is probably the most bitterly regarded aspect of every Minnesotan's life, but it does have its positive sides. First, it makes it possible to pull cars out of the garage without them becoming hopelessly stuck, especially cars with relatively low clearance (like the Protege). Second, after spending a solid hour shoveling, the shovelers can spend the rest of their day of leisure secure in the knowledge that they in fact did get some exercise in the morning, and furthermore, this exercise was work that has detectable results. Shoveling's classification as "work" makes it all the more satisfying and allows the shoveler to more easily justify a day of slovenly respite.

2. Point Break. My favorite movie of all time; Megs had never seen it. On the surface, sure it seems like another "whoa!" Keanu Reeves movie, but in reality its an allegory on the argument on the true expression of human nature: civilized man vs. savage man, an argument that dates back to Rousseau and Descartes. The movie eloquently articulates the case of the noble savage, most notably in the scene where Bodi, played masterfully by Patrick Swayze, passionately states that "We serve as an example to those people inching along the highway in their metal coffins that human spirit is still alive." However, the movie ultimately makes the case the savage spirit, anarchy for lack of a better term, ultimately destroys everything around it. I've always meant to write an analysis of the movie, maybe I'll take a crack at it sometime in the next few weeks.

Oh, the surfing cinematography is amazing, the score is moving, there are several gunfights, and Keanu has some absolutely hilarious lines at the end. It's a must see.

3. Ohio State vs. Wisconsin. #1 vs #2 only a few short weeks before the beginning of March Madness. Two of the best players in the nation squaring off, Greg Oden and Alando Tucker. A finish that went down to the wire. Wisconsin losing. What could be better?

On a side note, has anybody figured out why Greg Oden has been continuing to get the press that he has as the next phenom when he hasn't had that great of a season? Seriously, compare his stats to Kareem, Walton, Ewing, Mourning, Russell...the boy's got a ways to go.

4. Miracle. After Point Break, Megs declared that she got to call the next movie and, to my never ending fortune, she picked Miracle. I had forgotten what a great movie this is; the scene where Brooks makes the team skate till they are puking always gives me chills. Plus, any movie that practically spotlights "The U" is golden in my book.

5. Amazing Race. Has there ever been a realty show team more unstoppable than Rob & Amber? Seriously, they're like the Roger Federer of realty television at this point: so good it's scary to watch them take the opposition apart. With that said, there are too many variables within the Amazing Race to declare them winners at this point, but it's certainly theirs to lose.

I should mention at the end of all this that Megs made carmel bars today.

Ain't life grand sometimes? :-D

Frank's Financial Primer

2007-02-01T22:07:00.000-06:00

Over the past year, I have spent a considerable amount of time learning about personal financial planning. In fact, I would say that after Megs, the Gophers, DanceKast, and my family, reading about personal finance has been my biggest hobby of the year.

I can’t exactly pinpoint why the subject has prompted my interest. Maybe it’s because it seems like a prudent time to be figuring this stuff out, maybe I’m just getting to be a greedy business school grad. Either way, I want to take this opportunity to share some of my insights from the past year.

The financial world is a crazy world and is made confusing by two factors: Wall street’s deliberate attempts to confuse people and the general awe people grant the subject of personal finance. People are constantly beset by questions like: should I use a financial planner? Which mutual funds perform best? How do I even begin investing? Should I buy individual stocks? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!?!?!?

I’m no certified financial planner, but based on my year of study, I am willing to offer these few juicy morsels to get people started right on the year:

Read Up. Yahoo Finance has new updated articles every day by some of the best financial writers around; some of their better writers are Ben Stein, Laura Rowley, and David Bach. This content is free and, quite frankly, all you need to know to get started in the world of investing.
Stick to Indexes. Yes, every once and awhile a fund manager while beat the S&P 500, but almost none do consistently and absolutely none do by a margin that would offset a managed mutual fund’s higher expense ratio. Do yourself a favor and stick to index mutual funds.
Diversify. Quite frankly, it’s the only “free lunch” in investing. It makes sense that spreading your funds around several investments is a safer bet; what is less intuitive is that you can actually increase your return by this spreading. Read this article for a few great options.
Open a Roth IRA. If you make less than the restricted amount, open a Roth IRA and contribute your $4,000.00 for 2006. You have until April 15. Go on. Get started.
Account Structure. Near as I can tell, you want to have 3 types of accounts: a checking account (for everyday transactions – preferably at a credit union), a high interest online savings account (ING, Emigrant Direct, or GMAC Bank), and a brokerage account to manage your Roth IRA or other securities (Vanguard, Fidelity). All these accounts can be linked to transfer funds electronically to each other, making it easy to get paid, move money to savings, and then move money to longer term investments.

Investing can be as complicated as you want, but it doesn’t have to be. Education these days is free, so make sure you read up. Remember – knowledge is power.

If nothing else, follow the PYF (pay-yourself-first) formula and put 10% of your paycheck in savings.

This article was the inspiration for this column.

Franky J

The DK is Born

2007-01-25T21:45:00.000-06:00

www.dancekast.com

The DK is born! Check it out everybody and get ready to check back often. Phil and I are working on a project we think could be the next great step in the dance industry.

Crazy stuff!

Frank

Holiday Roundup

2006-12-25T22:21:00.000-06:00

Another holiday season has come and gone and, remarkably, I’m still standing.

Megan and I started the holidays out with a trip to Chicago to take in the sights and get away for a weekend together. We decided to take the “Megabus,” a bus service that runs throughout the Midwest and offers round trip tickets for as little as $1 (our tickets were $16 each, round trip). Though our trips were admirably inexpensive, our rides were beset by annoying co-riders on the way down (woman with 7 rowdy children) and the way back (the singing gospel sisters). This was the second time I dragged Megan on a protracted bus ride, the first being our trip to New York, and I imagine this will be the last (she was sick on the way up and down and six hours of screaming ladies in your ear is enough to drive anyone crazy). Chicago, however, was brilliant; the city was very nicely decorated and we had a terrific time touring the art museum, strolling through Millennium Park, and indulging in Chicago’s culinary delights, most notably deep dish pizza. The only downer of the trip was that we were unable to meet up with my friend Bill due to cell phone communication problems; hopefully things work out better next time. (photos from the Chicago trip)

After our trip, Megs and I mostly worked and tried to finish our Christmas shopping. I’ve been working fairly long hours at the office and have been putting significant hours into Phil and my pet project, Dancekast, so shopping and decorating time has been hard to come by. On Saturday, Megs packed up and headed for De Forest, Wisconsin, which left me to finish up any miscellaneous tasks around the house before heading out to Brooklyn Park to join my family.

This year’s family Christmas festivities were another page from our usual celebration recipe: Christmas Eve at my mom’s side, Christmas Day in Canon Falls with my father’s side. Overall, things went very well on both visits, meaning I was able to get some quality jokes in on both occasions and avoided spilling wine on any furniture or party attendees (unlike Thanksgiving – sorry John!). My highlight gift of the season on the giving side were tickets to Chicago at the Ordway for my folks; I think they’ll really enjoy them and it was nice to thank them for all the support and help they’ve given me over the past year. My highlight on the receiving side was a new GPS unit from my parents, something I have been lusting after for a good while now.

Hope everybody had a safe and happy Christmas celebration this year and that Santa left you what you all wanted.

With much love and wishes for a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year,

Franky J

Say What?

2006-11-20T18:05:00.000-06:00

While watching Sportscenter just now...

(one of the announcers talking about Tom Brady torching the Green Bay Packers this weekend)

"How accurate is he when he is more accurate than normal accurate!"

Sportscenter announcers ladies and gentlemen!

My Sick Addiction

2006-11-15T22:03:00.000-06:00

The Gophers drive me crazy.

I should confess on the front end that, against all rhyme or reason, the Gophers are the one team I follow obsessively. I read the message boards. I follow the recruiting news. I hum the Rouser at least 87 times a day at work. I talk about them constantly with my friends and family (probably to the point of annoyance). I’ll even read Sid Hartman’s columns in the hopes of garnering some previously unknown Gopher tidbit.

It’s sick, I know.

Most people in this town follow the Vikings; “Purple Pride” as the saying goes. Not me. Maybe it’s because I’m a U of M alum, maybe its our family tradition of interest in and support for the U, maybe it’s the colors. Whatever it is, my sporting consciousness is completely enchanted by the Maroon & Gold.

But this season…*shudder*.

I think this season can be best summed up by an exchange I had with my dad during the Maroon & Gold’s game against NDSU (yes, mighty division II North Dakota States). The Gophs were trailing at the end of the first half when I got a phone call from Dad. “Hello?” I said, unprepared for the storm about the be unleashed by Dad, “Why the hell isn’t Mason playing Justin Valentine?!?!” he sputtered, “the kid was a 4 star recruit of Ohio and is a beast of a blocker running out of an I. I don’t even see him on the sideline. I guaranty if Mason puts him in we smash right down the field and score, there’s no way their linebackers can stop him. Do you think the Mafia whacked him and he’s in the Mississippi right now? Should I call the boats? Is he auditioning for Dancing With the Stars? What the hell is happening here?!?!?”

The third quarter rolled around with neither team scoring, again the call. “Hello?” “I just don’t understand it, why aren’t we running I formation? You’re telling me that running behind Valentine, Pinnix doesn’t hang 300 yards on these guys? I don’t think I can watch much more of this. Mason makes me hate knowing anything about football.”

In the fourth quarter, Mason finally puts in Justin Valentine, our talented fullback, and the Golden Gophers march right down the field and score. Within five minutes, I get the call. “Hello?” I said, which was answered with a simple, yet poetic: “I hate Glen Mason.”

That about sums it up.

The Gophers, I have come to realize, are the ultimate tease. They show glimpses of brilliance that inspire the hope that maybe, just maybe, this is the year the program will finally turn around, but inevitably follow it up by reaching down their fan’s throats and ripping their collective guts out one painful inch at time. Sometimes it’s just too much for me to bear and I’ll swear the rodents off for good, only to stagger back to them like a hopeless heroine addict, covered in needle marks labeled Michigan 2003, Wisconsin 2005, Purdue 2001, Michigan 2004…

I just don’t understand Glen Mason this year; he has completely mismanaged this team. First, he has a quarterback who is a fairly accurate passer but who gets frustrated and begins making mistakes once he gets dinged once or twice. Second, he has a big, but not overly mobile, offensive line that is mostly comprised of first year starters. Third, he has one of the best receiving corps in the Big Ten including Matt “Mr. Tough Guy” Spaeth, Logan “I OWN AJ Hawk” Payne (by far my favorite player on the team), Erick “Why throw it to me? I only catch everything” Decker, and Ernie “I’d drop the ball even if you hit me in the face with it” Wheelwright. Fourth, Mason has strong, though not overly quick/shifty running backs in Jay Thomas, Amir Pinnix, Justin Valentine, and (don’t even get me started on this one) Alex Daniels. What do you do offensively with this scenario?

Obviously you do two things. First, run Cupito (the QB) out of a shotgun. We all know he turns into a bigger nut-job than Dudley the Pearson’s Nut Roll spokesman once he gets hit once or twice, so you have to give him the most time possible make his throws. Second, run the ball straight ahead out the I-formation since it will allow the offensive line to use their natural strength (size) and utilize one of the most potent weapons on the team, Justin Valentine and his nasty blocking.

But what does Mason do? He has Cupito snap the ball under center and runs the same zone-blocking scheme with the offensive line that he has been running for the past 4 years with a completely different team! Of course he does! This has led to Cupito being sacked a career high 15 times this season (up from 3 last year) and the team’s lowest rushing yards total since 1998. Thank you Glen Mason!

Ugh, I need to stop thinking about this for tonight…

Return of the Domination

2006-09-21T23:13:00.000-05:00

A quick little FYI to all you sucka mcs playin flag football at the U this year: finally, Franklin has come back to Bierman field!

3 picks, 1 for a TD in our opening week stomping.

You've all been warned...

VOM Day

2006-09-19T20:07:00.000-05:00

Let us always remember this joyous day. Let us always recall how we were delivered from evil, tyranny, and oppression. Let us forget the terrible shrieks we once cried, the terrible shouts we uttered, and the terrible, all-consuming fear we felt. Let us light candles, chant psalms, and whack piñatas to honor and distinguish this day, the 14th of September, VOM Day (Victory Over Mouse Day).

VOM Day
Originally uploaded by *Dancin*Jim*Slade*.

Ding-dong, the mouse is gone!

A day to Remember

2006-09-12T20:26:00.000-05:00

Today was a day like no other.

In the annals of human history, this day shall always be remembered as a singularly spectacular day, a day when human kind cried to the heavens “we may not know who or what we are or why we are here, but damnit, we’re here and lovin’ it!” A day that will be remembered and revered in the years to come, and spoken of as a legend in the ages that will follow those years.

Today was the day Justin brought the sexy back.

We don’t know who or what took it and where they’ve been keeping it all this time, such details are irrelevant in the face of an occasion such as this. The only thing that matters is that, at long last, the sexy is back and humanity can once again rejoice and be merry.

In celebration of this momentous occasion, I encourage everyone to think about what they would bring back. I for one have decided to bring Zubaz back:

I’m bringin’ zubaz back
*yeah*
You can wear them at the gym or at the track
*yeah*
They come in lots of colors including black
*yeah*
They stretch so you can wear them if you’re fat
*yeah*
…get yourself some zubaz!

Opportunities to reach into the past and resurrect a long-lost lifestyle, hobby, or love are rare and should be seized when presented. Justin has opened the flood gates, now it is up to us to discover what is missing in our lives, and like Justin, bring it back.

So I ask you, what are you bringing back?

Yes, these are the things that run through my head...

2006-09-10T11:07:00.000-05:00

A marketing idea for Quiznos:

We’re bringin’ toasty back
*yeah*
You’ll like it better toasty, that’s a fact
*yeah*
We got the flavor that the others lack
*yeah*
So come into our place and have a snack
*yeah*
…take it to the Quiznos!

Pranked

2006-08-30T15:12:00.000-05:00

I meant to link this a few months ago for everyone to see, but this is the tale of the best prank that has ever been pulled on me. Hands down. Bar none. No contest.

It's also a great compliment from one of my best friends. Thanks Ta.

I'm Back!!!

2006-08-29T23:24:00.000-05:00

Woot!

After a very long hiatus, I'm back everybody! Sorry for utterly disappearing from the blogosphere as they like to call it, but life has been rather crazy for the past month or so. A brief recap:

1. I bought a house! - That's right, an actual real life, got windows-doors-and roof, cram all your crap in the attic, kick your feet up because hot damn it's mine HOUSE! It's a sweet little place in south Minneapolis just off the Hiawatha light-rail line where me, the Megatron, Kevster, and Hairy Tim reside. Suffice to say, there will be much house discussion on this blog from now on.

2. It's coming...! - Me and a few friends are getting set to unleash a revolution upon the dance world. :-D More details will definitely follow.

3. Traveling! - My dad and I's trip to Glacier National Park got cancelled this summer because of the house purchase, but I did manage to make it out to Washington D.C. to visit my Uncle Paul, Aunt Kathy, and cousins Theresa and John and to attend my friend Mark Wernly's wedding. That's right, I rocked it stag to a wedding on the east coast! Suffice to say it was a great trip, but I'm hoping to write a bit more about it in the coming weeks. The major trips for the fall are a possible journey up to Lake Superior's North Shore for some hiking and a few trips to the cabin for fishing.

4. Wedding's galore! - This certainly has been a hectic wedding season for me. Rory & April, Mark and Jenn, Chris & Jenny, and Monica & Bryan. *whew* That's quite a list. They were all a blast, though Rory & April's was by far the most intense for me since I was pulling Groomsman duty in it.

Obviously there's a lot more to talk about, but not on this come-back blog, this renaissance of my rhetorical repertoire. Nope those tales must be saved for another night.

Till then, I hope everybody is safe and well. Be sure to take a few moments to read my brother Andrew's blog that he is writing about his adventures in Norway, it's pretty amazing stuff.

Gnight!

Can I get a Witness!

2006-06-29T22:26:00.000-05:00

So I was surfin the YouTube tonight, like any normal web adict, and I came accross a video that totally validates a post I made awhile ago. Seriously, it's eerie...

Cutting the Pork Cannot Save our Bacon

2006-05-13T13:07:00.000-05:00

These certainly are interesting days in the land of the free and the home of the brave. Fuel cost increases have thrown the country into a wallet-clutching seizure, basic health care continues to cost more for poorer service, and we are still mired in a war with little purpose and even less hope for success. Amidst all this, it seems everywhere I turn lately, unfortunately, the issue of “Pork-barrel Spending” is on the tip of everyone’s tongue. MPR had a program discussing pork spending on Tuesday during their “Midmorning” show, the Star Tribune ran an op-ed piece on Wednesday on the subject, and every citizen I seem to talk a bit of politics with wants to weigh in on the alleged “reckless spending” of our federal government.

On the surface, calling attention to and criticizing wasteful or excessive government spending is a no-brainer issue. Most everyone agrees that laughable projects such as the now infamous “bridge to nowhere” are unwise uses for tax dollars and would rather see the government exercise some restraint in its spending habits. Most agree that the United States is not in the best financial situation right now, with our trade deficit to China alone running anywhere from 13 to 20 billion (with a B) dollars per month. Most agree that it is about time we did something to fix this situation and long for competent leadership to place us back on the right path.

Politicians such as John McCain and Tom Coburn have recognized the public’s general agreement on these issues and made battling pork their primary mission in Washington, positioning themselves as the champions of fiscal responsibility and defenders of our bank accounts. They pose as crusaders against wasteful, irresponsible spenders, charging into battle against pork with an abandon that would make the great Achaean Achilles sing their praises to the gods and makes the public ooze with admiration. The sad reality is that these antics do little more than distract the public from our real financial issues.

Let’s go over this very simply: Citizens Against Government Waste (CAGW), the self described “#1 taxpayer watchdog,” places the estimate for pork-barrel spending in 2006 at right around $29 billion. Not all of this is necessarily wasteful spending, since “pork” spending is actually defined as a line-item in an appropriations bill that designates tax dollars for a specific purpose in circumvention of established budgetary procedures, but it seems reasonable and fair to allocate that entire $29 billion as pure waste. $29 billion; pretty big number, right? Of course it is. The problem is what this is as a percentage of our federal budget.

In 2006 our federal budget, the total amount the US government is planning to spend, is scheduled to be $2.7 trillion dollars. This means that the $29 billion everyone is up in arms about, the $29 billion McCain and Coburn are making their careers on, only amounts to around 1.04% of the federal budget. 1.04%! Even if we could somehow eliminate all of this wasteful spending, magically lift it straight out of the bills congress is considering, it wouldn’t begin to solve the financial problems the United States is facing today.

The financial problems in the United States today are not caused by pork-spending. Sure, wasting $29 billion is bad and everyone agrees that we should do our best to cut and eliminate wasteful spending, but the fact remains that concentrating on 1% distracts us from fixing the bigger challenges we face such as taxation reform, healthcare reform, and the looming energy crisis. Only taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture can save our bacon, and it all starts with cutting our obsession with pork.

Sign of the Times

2006-04-28T20:03:00.000-05:00

I finished up work today and headed out to the car. It had been a good week, but a tough week as well, and even the rain drops dotting my arm couldn’t wash away my anticipation for the newly arrived weekend. Ahh, “weekend;” the sweetest word in the working language. My foot punched the clutch of the Protégé and I set off to do battle with the gruesome specter of 394 during a Friday rush hour.

I made my way through downtown and northeast en route to Dinkytown where I was meeting my mom, dad, Andrew, and Kristen for dinner at Vescios. It never ceases to amaze me how a city can look both so desolate and so alive during a spring rain; like a living ying-yang symbol painted in greens, blues, blacks, and grays, smudged by the falling rain and twisted by my imagination. I turned down University and nimbly dodged around a city bus that had become sprawled across two lanes in its efforts to pick up some riders, pressing the accelerator downward in my sprint for spaghetti.

Dinner was enjoyable with the only disappointment being that Dad did not get enough meat in his “meat sauce.” We all agreed that this was a less than ideal situation (after all, isn’t the meat the most coveted part of any meat sauce? I mean, it’s in the freakin’ title!), but eventually decided to follow Chris Rock’s famous advice and let it slide.

Andrew and Kristen drove home with me in the Protégé where we were meeting our folks to surrender the Christmas tree we had borrowed back in December. On the way into the house from the driveway, Andrew turned and looked across the street into the neighbors yard and announced that there were ducks in their yard. “Really?” said Kristen and I. “Yes” replied Andrew, “two mallards it looks like.” “That’s so Brokeback” I responded as the garage door closed around our laughter echoing through the garage.

A Grain of Salt

2006-02-02T21:39:00.000-06:00

The garage door creaked open as my car door banged shut, sealing me in to what felt like my own plastic packaging, like I was an action figure waiting to be unwrapped by the gleeful fingers of my employer. “Oh well” I thought as I maneuvered around Pete’s parked maroon Camry, “at least I’m makin’ more dinero than GI Joe ever did” (though he admittedly did have far cooler things to play with at work than I do). I made my way down Lindig St. and turned down Larpenteur, making sure to avoid the retiree doing his crazy run/walk sashay down the sidewalk, and motored down the road.

As I drove, I tuned into 91.1 KNOW, better known to listeners around the state as Minnesota Public Radio, or MPR for short. I like listening to MPR in the morning, mostly because I don’t have time to thoroughly read the paper before I head out into the unknown, but also because they are the only medium that can spice up the news with sound effects, a key element to making the latest news on the stock market entertaining. I turned onto Highway 280 heading south, finding traffic surprisingly and pleasantly light this morning. My little yellow car sped along the pavement and the sounds of today’s weather report began to echo through the cabin, always one of the more critical portions of any news update. The announcer, Cathy Wurzer, began by proclaiming that the January we just finished was one of the warmest in modern history with temperatures in the Twin Cities averaging a balmy 28.6 degrees Fahrenheit. Ms. Wurzer went on to announce that scattered snow showers were expected in the north and over central Wisconsin, that the high today would be 31, and that it was mostly cloudy in the Twin Cities.

Huh?

I stared out my window into the big, bold, beautiful blue beyond that was today’s sky. There was not one cloud to be seen, not even a wisp. Not one single element of condensed water vapor in any direction for 200 miles or more. There were not any “clouds” of steam rising from downtown Minneapolis as there often can be during cold days. Not even the dark cloud of the Bush presidency could be detected on this gloriously sunny day, the kind of day that reminds me how much I love this planet and how good it can be to us.

How could this have happened? Did MPR just get a bad weather report and not bother to verify it with the information being transmitted through their optic nerves into their brains? Hard to believe considering some MPR employees, if not all of them, likely commuted in to work this morning and saw that it was definitively un-cloudy this morning. Was it so nice out that the good folks at 91.1 simply couldn’t believe it was reality? It would be hard to blame them considering some of the gloomy weeks we have had this winter; hard weeks of gloom and despair, weeks when the world has died and is yet waiting to be reborn. Or was it, as The Boss would have us believe, simply that the MPR employees had been “blinded by the light?”

(My own personal theory is that they knew it was a singularly beautiful day outside and further knew that if they raved about it too much, nobody would show up for work. Or if we did show up for work, we would spend all our time wishing we were outside instead of throwing our backs into America’s great economic struggle, so it was best to convince those with a low enough IQ (or limited enough access to sunlight) that it was in fact cloudy outside and we should continue with business as usual.)

I guess my point in writing this is that if MPR can make the mistake of announcing to the public that it is cloudy outside on a day when that is clearly not the case, what other kinds of mistakes does the media make? To get this one right, all the good folks at KNOW (such an ironic station ID after this event) had to do was look out the window, and most of the time, reporting accurate news is not that easy. It reminded me to take what I hear, read, and watch with a grain of salt, to be skeptical of what is said or announced and have the guts to think for myself. Because, after all, if MPR can fail to announce that, for reason’s unknown, the Earth has decided to remind us all of what a wonderful place this is and how good it can feel to be alive, anything is possible.

Top Five

2006-01-11T22:34:00.000-06:00

Ouch, almost a month and a half since my last post…

Sorry everybody, I certainly don’t mean to leave you all hanging, but sadly (at least for my writing), life has been insanely busy over the past month. My duties at the dance studio have effectively doubled, work has been insane, and most importantly, I have gotten my hot little mitts on Civilization 4 (damn you Sid Meirs for taking all my free time!). Anyway, I’m back with a short post that I’ve been mulling over for sometime now, hope everybody enjoys!

The other night I was explaining to the kids down in Red Wing why I was a dancer, citing things such as its inherent athleticism and world class access to gorgeous, underdressed girls. But most of all, I was a dancer because of the music. I love music more than I can describe, and I can’t play an instrument or sing, which left dance as just about the only avenue left for me to explore my relationship with song. What always excites me about dance is the way a song can carry or drive you along, the way its energy can flow through your body, infusing your cells with the rhythm of the universe. It’s a magical feeling and the addictive quality that keeps me, quite inexplicably, coming back for more.

This begs the obvious question “What is/are your favorite song(s),” a complicated question I always have a tough time answering, since there are just so many good answers. However, I have decided I am up to the challenge, and in an ode to John Cusack’s character in High Fidelity, I have decided to compile my top five in a listing with an attempt at defending my selections. And without further adieu…

#1: “Gimme Some Lovin’” – Spencer Davis Group
Honestly, I have yet to meet somebody that doesn’t love this song. The singing of young Steve Winwood and the driving beat make the sound irresistible. But what really sells it for me is that the song isn’t about anything but having a great time and enjoying your life, and really, who can’t relate to that? The chorus, it seems to me, is the call of the human soul itself: “C’mon and gimme some lovin’!” Pretty much says it all

#2: “Running on Empty” – Jackson Browne
Browne is far and away my favorite singer/songwriter to listen to, mostly because his songs deal with unusual issues and have such a genuine feeling of insight about them. I’ve written about this song before in my column, but it’s a song I find myself coming back to time and again, partially because of the driving riffs and drums, but mostly because of Jackson’s lyrical skills.

#3: “Born to Run” – Bruce Springsteen
I’ve already written an entire post on this song explaining my identification with it, so check it out if you’d like it explained.

#4: “Sooner or Later” and “I Want You” – Bob Dylan
I always think of these songs together since they are found back to back on Dylan’s prolific album Blonde on Blonde, so I thought I would mention them together. The piano in “Sooner or Later” is great, and I love the statement it makes about relationships; that, eventually, everybody looks back and understands why people did what they did and how we’re all victims of the circumstances we find ourselves in. “I Want You” always sounds like the embodiment of what I think of love feeling like: silly, whimsical, and happy yet earnest and sincere at the same time. The song just feels right; a hard essence to capture as an artist, but a thing of beauty to the audience.

#5: “Oh Yoko!” – John Lennon
Sometimes I feel as if the rest of the world is sitting around waiting for me to come up with the energy to make it go, and many times, I wonder if I have enough energy within me to make it all work. This song always reminds me of everything everybody has given me or done for me during my life and helps me decide, yeah, I do have enough passion to keep going. I know, it’s egotistical as hell, but it’s the best way I can describe it. The song also reminds me of the Megs, which is always a bonus.

Honorable Mentions:

“Diamonds on the Souls of Her Shoes” – Paul Simon
His song writing is unreal, and this is my favorite

“Learning to Fly” – Tom Petty
A FAR better song than his cliché and overplayed “Free Fallin”

“I’m Alive” – Cut ‘N’ Move
Cheese-pop techno at its finest!

“Jet Airliner” – Steve Miller
Great riff, great lyrics, great song

Anyway, that’s a little summary of the top of my musical world. I would encourage any readers to comment their favorites, it would be great to read!

I’ll try and do better to keep Minnesotan on the Loose updated in the coming weeks. Happy 2006 everybody!

The Mariah Carey Effect

2005-11-20T21:28:00.000-06:00

Halloween has come and gone and Thanksgiving’s glorious presence is just around the corner (seriously, a holiday that bears the sole purpose of getting people to eat and visit without any burden of expectations or extravagant present buying? Sign me up), which means that America’s first love, the Christmas holiday season, is upon us. It is an infatuation whose utter devotion continues to startle and amaze me, yet one that apparently has not yet hit its deepest depths. This year I would like to write about a concept that has intrigued me for sometime now: the female fascination with Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You.”

First released in 1994 on her album “Merry Christmas,” Ms. Carey’s holiday anthem hit the collective feminine psyche like a one horse open sleigh on a mission from God, permanently imprinting itself into their own special collective unconscious (which we ALL know they have) and forcing them to lose control when it is played. Signs of control loss include bopping with hands clenched tightly together, incessant humming, and repeated utterances of the phrase “I LOVE this song!” I myself have been witness to this disturbing glimpse into girly goofiness on several occasions; here is my story.

Exhibit A: Christmas 2000, Butterfield Gallery of Dance. The world was enthralled with the 2,000th anniversary of its relationship with one Jesus H. Christ and dreading the prospect of a computer meltdown that, by all reports, would inevitably occur a mere six days later. I was at the dance studio for a rehearsal, but in the finest of dance traditions, we had decided to have a bit of an impromptu holiday party instead. Some festive music had been put on the sound system and everybody was have a generally good time drinking punch and chatting when all of a sudden, it happened. “All I Want for Christmas is You” came over the speakers and the girls in the room lost control, clutching each other, singing, and dancing like those famous followers of Dionysus, except without all the bother of cruelty, murder, and mayhem. It was four minutes of pandemonium the likes of which I had never seen, an image that haunts and confuses me to this day.

Exhibit B: November 2005, Offices of Principal Resources. It was a normal workday around the office, a day filled with fear and loathing as my co-workers and I struggled to make it to the end with what little shreds of our dignity and sanity we could manage to hang on to. The melodic tones of 102.9 Lite FM drifted through our cubicles, emanating from our telephone speakers and reverberating down the hall into a nothingness that could only begin to imitate the nothingness of that stations music lineup. Without warning, “All I Want for Christmas is You” began playing and drove the women of the office into a frenzy. They began singing and excitedly chattering about “loving this song sooooooo much.” Now, this may not sound all that extraordinary, but compared to the usual subdued nature of these individuals, their reaction marked an explosion of reckless abandon due to this song. Jason, the other male of the office, and I did the only sensible thing: hid under our desks and waited for the song to change.

Exhibit C: Later November 2005, 1715 Lindig Street. It was the end of another long day and I was happily brushing my teething, attempting to stave off decay from at least one part of my body and thinking about what I needed to get done the next morning. Megan was in bed with her Lappy making preparations to watch our nightly episode of Friends, one of the more enjoyable parts of may day to be sure. As I placed my toothbrush in its “floating fish” toothbrush holster, I heard from my left (your right) a sharp *click* *click* and the beginnings of Mariah’s irrepressible “All I Want for Christmas is You.” Like a woman possessed, Megan sprang to her feet on the bed and began shaking her hips in a spitting image of the Supreme’s performing their hit “Stop in the Name of Love,” complete with imaginary microphone. She then proceeded to sing the entire song while bopping around the room and otherwise having a hi-ho time. Flabbergasted by her behavior, I quickly grabbed my camera in an attempt to finally obtain some photographic evidence of the effects of this ode to holiday cheer. The results can be seen below.

What is it about the song that causes girls to lose their damn minds? Is it the irrepressible beat, the themes of love and dedication, or a secret frequency being tested by the government for mind control purposes? I honestly haven’t a clue, but I do know that it is wise to exercise extreme caution whenever you find your ears beset by the melodious tones of Ms. Carey within 60 days of the Winter Solstice. Good luck everybody!

An Update

2005-11-16T22:04:00.000-06:00

Hello everybody. As of late, I’ve been writing a fair number of “point of view” pieces or articles about things that interest me, which I’ve found really rewarding and enjoyable. However, the secondary purpose of this blog (second to providing an outlet for my ramblings) is to let people know what is going on in my life. Alright, here it goes…

I suppose the biggest thing that happened recently is that Megan and I celebrated our one year anniversary as a couple. That’s right, Frank Wambach has now dated a girl for a whole year! Amazing, miracles really do happen. Megs and I get to see each other a fair amount since she is still going to school at the U, but her moving to Burnsville makes things tough occasionally. Oh well, what relationship doesn’t have its little things that make it a struggle? All in all, things are very well between us, and the Megatron remains my best friend and closest confidant. If you have not met her yet, please, the next time you are in town, let me know and I will introduce you. She’s somebody you just gotta meet!

I am still working as a relationship manager at Principal Resources doing finance work and am starting to get a little better at it. Everyday seems to have its own special crisis, when the fate of the free world hinges upon our ability to enter data into a computer as fast as humanly possible. I’m learning quite a lot about the business world working there, but more importantly also learning about who I am, what I want out of life, and how I’m going to get it. It’s amazing to me that at 23 years old I’ve been able to learn as many things about myself as I have; kinda alarming in some ways, yet reassuring in others. Hard to explain the way it makes me feel.

Still teaching dance 1 day a week which will soon move to 2 days a week. Sometimes I think that I might have made a mistake coming back since it takes quite a bit of my free time up, but it is a great creative outlet for me. The kids down at Fusion are doing a great job this year, I’ve been very impressed by the progress they have made. Pretty remarkable to think that just 3 years ago, those kids were just starting to learn how to dance like it mattered, now they are scholarship and competition winners. Amazing.

It pains me to say that I’ve been having trouble finding time to do the things that I really enjoy; taking crazy photographs, reading crazy books, and going on crazy adventures. I think that’s kinda the way it goes during these years though, you spend a lot of time doing things you have to do rather than things you want to do, which is sad, yet necessary. I guess all we can really hope for is an opportunity to do what it is we think we want, and that we’re lucky enough that it makes us happy when we get the chance.

I miss a lot of people like crazy. Phil, Rory, Ta, Army Mark, Markadelphia, Jake, Craig… Sometimes it feels like I’m doomed to constantly lose my friends, like a giant magnet is deliberately polarizing them against me and flinging them about the world in reaction to my attempts to get closer. It isn’t anybody’s fault per say, it’s just the way life works at this age, like a giant river carrying us off in our own little boats for parts unknown.

Anyway, I’m starting to ramble. Overall, things are good. I’ve got a job, a good place to live, a great family, and a great girl. What more could a 23 year old guy ask for? Well ok, maybe a sports car and an HD TV would improve my life marginally, but my point is that, for the most part, everything is hunky-dory in this little corner of the world.

Civic Embarassment

2005-10-13T22:57:00.000-05:00

I finished work at 5:04 PM, exhausted as usual and looking at another night of trying to get things done. It really is amazing how things seem to stack up, as if some mad scientist is simply stacking the odds higher and higher against me in the hopes of finding my breaking point. “Well Mr. Scientist, you shall not taste victory today!” is my standard retort to this daily examination, and all I can do is hope that, for at least one more day it remains true.

Since it was Thursday, I made my way over to the gym to try and restore some of the physical prowess that left me so long ago. Hard to believe that at one point I was almost 200 lbs. of vigorous human considering my current lank-a-licious state. As Jackie, the lady who cuts my hair, said the other day, “Frankie, you’re looking a little skinny. When are you gonna start pumping some iron again?” I’m trying Jackie, believe me I’m trying.

As I wound my way through Golden Valley passing other hard working people on their way home and gas stations looking to gouge them as deeply as possible, I listened to a story on MPR about an elderly woman and her trouble with heating. You see, natural gas prices are expected to rise right around 40% here in Minnesota, making it rather difficult for some people that don’t have much to get by. The story focused on the ways that she tried to stay warm during the winter including layers of blankets at night, sleeping with her dog for warmth, and visiting department stores for a bit of relief from the cold during the day when it gets dangerously cold.

The lady was a cripple, completely unable to work because of a back injury sustained in her previous occupation. Her monthly income between disability and social security was right around $800 while her monthly rent was a little over $500, leaving right around $300 to cover all her other expenses including food, transportation, utilities, and treats for the grand kids when they visit (what gramma doesn’t have treats for the little ones when they come over?).

At its core, the story was about how the federal government helps subsidize people’s heating costs to a certain extent, but not really enough to keep them afloat, something that will likely being exacerbated by increasing heating costs. In this case, this elderly woman, though she cuts every corner imaginable, even at the expense of her health (she has arthritis which causes her extreme pain when it is cold in the house), she can’t really afford to heat her house and is currently indebted to the government.

How can we as a country live with ourselves when things like this happen? How can we have any sense of civic pride when we leave our sick to die in the wake of disaster, our hungry to starve without a real effort at relief, and our elderly to freeze because they simply can’t afford to pay anymore? Is the most wealthy, proud, and powerful country in the world completely impotent to act benevolently towards its citizenry?

It filled me with such despair to hear that this was happening, such a bitter sense of hopelessness. I know, I know, there are undoubtedly people out there who could justify this by saying she deserved to be living in this state for one reason or another, and still others who will waste no time hurling their “love it or leave it” platitudes at me just as fast and furiously as they can. The bottom line is any country that thinks as highly of itself as America does has some pretty high standards to live up to, and this is a case where, I'm sorry, but we have failed utterly.

To be honest, listening to this story as it unfolded from my car door speakers and echoed through my conscience, it was the first time in my life that I was truly embarrassed of the United States. It embarrassed me that our country would allow any of its citizens to live like this, that it would allow a poor woman incapable of working to freeze.

We can do better than that.

Megatron

2005-10-03T00:22:00.000-05:00

Megan.

I’ll be honest everybody. When you meet my girl, it’s completely understandable that you would think she is just another blonde without a clue. For whatever reason, the Megatron tries real hard to convince us all that she’s a space cadet of the first degree, a girl with few priorities beyond securing pretty things for her fingers, hair, and toes.

DON’T BE FOOLED!!! IT’S A TRICK!!!

Granted, there’s no way Girl is coming up with the solution to cold fusion, but then again, who is? My point is that it is extremely unwise to count Megs out, underestimate or turn your back on her. She has a tenacity that could inspire an Amazon (think Patty Smith’s “The Warrior,” one of the songs that always makes me think of Megs) and a self righteous streak that would make Michael Moore look positively apologetic. Let me give you an example…

Last winter, Megs and I went to New York for New Years. We walked all over Midtown and Central Park, something like 10 miles total after being up at 4 AM to catch a bus to the Big Apple from Washington DC. At about 6 PM we went to Times Square to line up for the ball drop and were not allowed to leave for any reason whatsoever. After about an hour worth of waiting, Megan announced that she needed to pee and wanted to know what our options were. The local police officers informed us that our options were to get out of line, find a deli or other local eatery, and enjoy the incomparable sensation of an empty bladder, but lose our space in line OR to grin and bear it. Megs ended up holding it for five hours folks, WITHOUT ONE SINGLE COMPLAINT! Could your gal do that?

Anyway, so she’s tough. But Girl’s got brains too. For example, this winter Megs will graduate with a degree in Retail Merchandising and a minor in Spanish (oh yeah, she’s basically fluent in Spanish) with over a 3.2 GPA while working close to 40 hours a week during her past 3 years in school. Impressive, no? This summer she studied for 6 weeks in Venezuela where she basically had no choice but to speak Spanish and was able to come away with solid A's in every class. As anyone that has studied abroad can tell you, pulling quality grades in a difficult situation such as that is no small accomplishment.

Of course, Megan’s greatest strength is neither her toughness or her raw intelligence, though she certainly has plenty of both. What I find so incredibly enchanting about her is her intuition for what it takes to make things ok. At her core, Megan is a girl that wants people to be happy, wants people to smile and laugh and enjoy themselves and she is willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen. It is a rare wisdom to find in a person and the quality that makes me so hopelessly hers.

That’s why she’s my baby. My Megatron.

Inspired by “Here Comes My Baby” by Cat Stevens

A Brief Whine

2005-09-19T20:30:00.000-05:00

Over the past few weeks, for the first time in my life as I remember it, I have not felt like myself. Granted, there have been occasions in the past where I have felt estranged from myself or disembodied in an uncomfortable way (a few notable encounters with tequila come to mind), but I have never felt a long-term separation from all that I think of myself as being like I have recently.

Some of this comes from the fact that I’ve started a new job with a new routine, and that always leads to a period of adjustment and redefinition of who you are. I have to say I kind of expected to change a little bit because of this, but I didn’t think it would leave me with this void of self-doubt and confusion about who I was and what I stood for. It’s hard to be locked into a routine that doesn’t allow me time to enjoy who and what I am and pursue who I want to be. The only way I can describe the way my day makes me feel right now is “stagnation,” a striking difference from the hope and optimism provided to me nearly every day by the vitality of the U’s campus. For the first time in my life, I don’t feel like I’m getting better, and it bother’s me terribly.

A bigger portion of it, undoubtedly, is that I feel like most of the people I enjoy really talking with just aren’t around anymore and that my opportunities for quality conversation are few and far between. This might not seem like a big deal, but to an individual that thrives on talking about what is going on or what could be going on, it is personality crowbar that has quickly and efficiently dislodged me from myself.

I know, I know, I sound like the biggest whiner in the world and I am truly sorry that I don’t have something more interesting to write about at the moment. What I’m trying to say through this whole mediocre post is that it’s very hard to stay who I am when I can’t do the things that make me “Me.” How long can we be somebody else before it becomes who we are and replaces who we were? Do we ever have a choice about any of this? Probably not is my guess. Our only option is to go with the flow and try and hang on to a small shred of who we thought we might have been at one time.

Change certainly is inevitable, and the better we are at accepting it the easier life becomes. But that doesn’t change the fact that I miss who I was and am unsure about who I am. Mostly I miss talking with Rory, Ta, Grant, and Mark and looking so confidently down the road towards a better tomorrow.

Born to Run

2005-09-14T00:33:00.000-05:00

“In the day we sweat it out in the streets of a runaway American dream
At night we ride through mansions of glory in suicide machines”

I think everybody has moments where they connect with songs. Badly Drawn Boy would have us believe that “songs, are never quite the answer, just the soundtrack to a life that is over all too soon,” but I find that songs can often times give me whatever it is I need, be it a pick-me-up for my soul or a reason to get up and boogie down. A great song is a song that you just can’t help but get caught up in, an anthem that just sits right in all your joints and swirls around your consciousness, unlocking secret caverns of thought and emotion that had previously been shrouded by the meaningless noise of the world. Great songs make me feel right and good in a way that is hard to describe and impossible to reproduce.

“Baby this town rips the bones from your back
It’s a death trap, it’s a suicide rap
We gotta get out while we’re young”

Sometimes I get these urges to run that are almost impossible to fight. It’s as if my soul suddenly has a seizure and decides that what’s going on here just isn’t happening anymore and that the grass is greener on the other side, wherever that other side may be. Something tells me that everybody has times where they feel like running, where they feel like things can’t possibly get better and that the only thing to do is strike out for something new and, hopefully, a shot at redemption. The difference between this feeling and mine is that mine is not created by despair, but rather this force that simply emerges and then vanishes. It’s this urge to run just as fast and far as I can until the exhaustion of the world drags me back into its clutches.

“Cause baby I’m just a scared and lonely rider
But I gotta know how it feels
I want to know if your love is wild
Girl I want to know if love is real”

I often think it would be nice for Megs and I to just pack up our stuff and head out for someplace new. I find myself often day dreaming of what our lives would be like living in Phoenix or New York and what a grand adventure it would be. I think about how great it would be for the two of us to experience something new together and how romantic it would be to be lost in the wonder of the world with nothing but each other.

“The highway’s jammed with broken heroes
On a last chance power drive
Everybody’s out on the run tonight
But there’s no place left to hide”

I guess I’ve been thinking about this unnerving habit of mine because of my most recent reading project: Jack Kerouac’s On the Road. My biggest, and definitely most unexpected, insight into the book is the way Kerouac talks about his Aunt that is constantly sending him money. It makes me think that the only way a life of freedom on the road, the life that blazes so beautifully in Kerouac’s words and so hauntingly in my dreams, is only possible when it is supported by those who choose to stay still rather than run. The only reason Kerouac survives on the road is because his Aunt, working back in the East, generously sends him money for food and supplies. It occurs to me that the central theme of the story, Kerouac’s quest for freedom on the road, is directly impacted by this. It seems hard to view Kerouac as truly free when he must rely on others to survive even though he may be the perfect embodiment of the unfettered soul in every other imaginable aspect. So there you have it, either you can be financially free and tied to your job and location, or you can be spiritually free and be utterly dependent upon the generosity and sacrifice of others for survival. Seems to me like it’s a hard choice to make: what way do you want to be free?

“Someday girl I don’t know when
We’re gonna get to that place
Where we really want to go
And we’ll walk in the sun
But till then tramps like us
Baby we were born to run”

Drifting Apart

2005-08-23T00:45:00.000-05:00

Grant Schwartz is the most mysterious person I have ever met. Someone utterly in love with humanity but completely unsure that it deserved to be saved. A total flake, but at the end of the day, the first person I think of when I reminisce on laughs and good times. For a long time, I wanted Grant’s friendship more than any other person’s on the planet, and that’s saying something because, let’s be honest, I dig people and crave friends like a drummer craves rhythm. In some ways, we were friends and remain friends to this day, certainly never becoming hostile to each other or exchanging bitter words over events that simply didn’t matter anymore. But in others, we were friends for only a very brief moment in time, while the rest of our relationship, like all of reality, has been largely composed of empty air and missed collisions.

I met Grant my sophomore year of college, undoubtedly the craziest year of my life. I was living with Ta in Middlebrook and doing my very best to live it up while the living was good, throwing parties and meeting people left and right. Grant lived two doors down from us and was living with the classic “worst nightmare” roommate (smelly, anti-social, petty, etc.), which meant that he was looking for decent local company in the worst way possible.

From the moment I met him, I was struck with the impression that Grant was one of the most earnest, soulful people I had ever met. He was artistic and creative to a spooky degree with an insatiable thirst for good books, yet real enough that he would spend a whole day doing nothing but drinking and playing video games. In other words, one eclectic fucker. It was the first time I had met another person with the same wandering in them, that had the same experience of suffering sudden shifts of the soul as I did. And it was great.

For the first time in my life, I felt like I could talk to somebody and have them understand what I meant rather than what I said, which if you’ve never experienced it, is a life changing ordeal. It was never so much what I talked about with Grant, since essentially no subject was left untouched, as the way he changed the conversation, filling it with a hope and vitality I had never sensed before. Our conversations gave me the feeling that we were actually solving something, actually making some progress, though whether that was actually the case remains doubtful in my mind. But that’s the point: it didn’t matter, and still doesn’t matter, because the feeling was the important thing, the holy thing.

My experience with Grant reached its peak the night he, Ta, Adam, Pat, and myself stayed awake till almost 5 AM discussing human civilization, its origins and failures, and ways things could be better. It was such a thorough rearranging of everything I had taken for granted for so long that, in some ways, I still haven’t recovered my faith and pride in human civilization as it exists now. See, Grant was a big fan of a writer named Daniel Quinn, most famously the author of the book Ishmael, and our conversation was his first successful attempt at arguing civilization as it exists today, not western civilization but ALL human civilization, cannot hope to survive. Of course the argument has flaws in it, big ones actually, but again, it didn’t matter, because we were excited about trying to make this a better world.

There were a few other great times, like when Grant moved in to Ta and my room because he couldn’t stand his weirdo roommate any longer, but otherwise our friendship slowly deteriorated after that point. I tried as hard as I could to be friends with Grant, but for whatever reason, he just wasn’t in anymore, and that was kind of that. Sure I mildly resented it at first and there are times where I’m upset that he can’t be enough of a friend to at least call me back. But what I’ve come to understand is that he recognized life was carrying him down a road separate from mine and that, though it was it was upsetting and unfortunate, there was very little either of us could do to stop it. I’m sure he knew how I felt, that he was a flake and a poor friend, which undoubtedly upset him, but the fact remained that there was nothing to be done except move on to whatever was next.

Of all the people I met over my college career, Grant is the one I miss seeing the most. The man has a zest for life that would put Kerouac to the test and a sense of fun that makes zoo monkeys seem like dull layabouts. And yeah, I miss the intelligence, the laughs, the booze, and the video games. But what I miss most is the feeling that things can and will get better; that the world is a beautiful, wonderful place just waiting to be enjoyed. I miss feeling like we can make a difference and that if we believe in something strongly enough there isn’t anything capable of deterring us. There aren’t enough people with that kind of exuberance in the world and they’re hard to replace when they’re gone.

Scotty Doesn't Know!!!

2005-08-05T07:32:00.000-05:00

Scotty doesn't know!!!!
Scotty doesn't know!!!!
Don't tell Scotty, cause Scotty Doesn't know!!!!

A Sinful Act

2005-08-02T23:25:00.000-05:00

Today I committed a most sinful act.

Murder? No, the Caboose is still alive and well (though I vow that kid is on borrowed time sometimes).

Dishonoring my mother and father? Nope, if anything, merely being associated with me is the greatest honor they could ever ask for, so it is hard to see how I could ever be a source of their dishonor. I am of course kidding (except I’m really not).

Theft? Nada. Still faithfully involved with the Megatron folks, which means, sadly, no ladies hearts were stolen today.

Then what was it?!?! Tell me already!!!

Today, I signed up at Costco. Yup, I’m officially paying to shop; $45 to be precise. $45 to peruse bottles of ketchup large enough for 832 years of “my throat has been slit!” practical jokes. $45 to pick my way through buckets of M&M’s that could easily be used to create playful pits of the chocolaty candies for young children to play in. You get the idea.

Normally I wouldn’t subscribe to such a self-serving service, one designed, quite overtly, to convince people to buy more and more until there is nothing left to buy and we all sit down and weep for our empty, hollow souls that have atrophied to the point that they cannot be satisfied by the natural beauty of life. However, one of my co-workers, Licia, the girl responsible for my indoctrination into “El Culto de Costco,” mentioned that Costco was a “blue company.” (In other words, they support Democrats) Man-o-man, this changed everything. Suddenly Costco was no longer a representative of the darkside, out to seduce and reduce me, but rather a champion of the light, delivering low prices and quality products to the oppressed. Or something like that.

Anyway, the line about Costco supporting Democrats worked its magic and, before I knew it, I had signed the dotted line and become the latest individual to experience the distinct pleasure of paying to shop. I have to say though, the place does look pretty cool, and the stuff they have, especially their steaks, looks really good and is much cheaper than even Cub or Target (which I didn’t think was humanly possible). We’ll see how it goes shopping at Costco, or as Licia refers to it, the “Diamond of St. Louis Park.”

On a side note, I feel like I should apologize for all the Republican bashing and pro-Democrat rhetoric being uttered on these pages. I know that it can make those who wish to remain on the political sidelines uncomfortable to read such statements, which I would like to avoid if at all possible. However, it’s my f’n blog and I’ll write what I dang well please in it.

And with that, adieu.

True Justice

2005-07-28T23:27:00.000-05:00

An example of true justice.

Everyday I drive 394, undoubtedly the worst road yet created by mortal hands and a blight upon the souls of those who must navigate it’s malevolent curves daily. I know what you’re thinking at this moment; you’re thinking:

“Whatever Frank, what do you know about driving. I drive (insert roadway name or number here) everyday, now THAT’s tough.”

I don’t disagree with you; in fact I am utterly certain that everybody has a path they must cross everyday, be it physical or metaphysical, that is trying and demanding beyond measure. But to compare your difficult roads to mine is to compare Bill Clinton to George Bush; yours is simply naughty, mine is downright evil. Let me explain.

All roads have their jam up points and complaining about them is like complaining about the weather, an exercise in futility. However, most roadway communities display common courtesy during these moments of stopitude as a sense of “we’re all in this together” seems to takeover the pack. A perfect example of this is 35W during rush hour, a road that carries tremendous traffic but rarely seems to stop. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen some nutso stuff on 35W, but that’s just because it’s being driven by crazed construction workers on their way home after a long day, desperate for a bite and a brew. But for the most part, things move along and people are courteous to each other.

Not 394.

394 is overrun with rich jerks in their new BMW’s just desperate to show how much better they are than you. The chief way they display this expressway elitism is to zoom down the lane dedicated to those exiting on 94 west, pretending that Brooklyn Park or Maple Grove is their final destination, intending all the while to cut into the 1.5 mile long line to exit on 94 east at the very last moment possible. It wouldn’t be so bad if it happened rarely or if it were people that were down on their luck and needed SOME kind of break. Unfortunately, it is almost ALWAYS these bastards that look like they’re from New York (slicked black hair and goofy sunglasses) driving 50K sports sedans. It’s as if they’re saying “Who me? Wait in line? Hahaha, surely you must be joking dear boy!” Every time it happens, I wish I had a homing device that would cause every black fly in the northern Minnesota woods to descend upon their vehicles in a seething mass of unholy vengeance. I figure that would show them.

So where is the justice in all of this?

On Tuesday morning, as I was heading into work, I noticed that the highway patrol had taken up residency in the 394 carpool lane, meaning certain doom for anyone stupid enough to enter this concrete no-less-than-two man’s land. Lo and behold, not 500 feet beyond where I first spotted the patrol cars, was a lone Mercedes Benz stopped dead in its tracks by the crimson lights of the highway patrol. I let out a loud woop and pumped my fist in the air, tasting the sweet juices of justice that has been delivered to the oppressed.

Life on Lindig

2005-07-19T22:56:00.000-05:00

Wow, been a little while since I’ve written in this bad boy. It’s amazing how easy it is to get sidetracked away from writing about what’s going on. So now that I’m back, let’s talk about what’s going on!

I’ve started a new job as a relationship manager for a capital group called Principal Resources. So far it’s a pretty good job; I got my stylin cubicle and computer and get to learn about neato finance stuff all day. The people there are pretty nice so far, though I occasionally get a weird vibe from them. Maybe it’s because I’m new. Or maybe it’s because they’re all republicans. Who knows.

Speaking of republicans, you’ve gotta just LOVE the game of semantics they’re playing with the whole “Karl Rove commits high treason, let’s figure out a way to save him” thing. It’s always so funny how a party that speaks so confidently and demandingly about self responsibility time and time again refuses to take responsibility for their actions. Good thing for them the United States has an insatiable appetite for hypocrisy; otherwise those folks would never get anywhere.

This past weekend I made it up to the cabin for the first time all year. Pretty unbelievable considering that there have been years where I have been up almost every weekend beginning in about May. Just more evidence that I keep getting busier I guess. The weather was nice, though it was windy, which made the fishing difficult. Always one to look on the bright side, however, I just took it as a sign that I should be reading books not casting lures. This insight led to me finishing Hyperion (one of the weirder sci-fi books I’ve read in a long, long while) and beginning On the Road by Jack Kerouac. We’ll see how On the Road goes; I hear it’s pretty good.

That’s about all that’s really new around here. Megan and I have been getting to see each other quite a lot over the past few weeks, which is a welcome change from her virtual exile down in Venezuela. Pete has gotten a job with Thompson West Publishing doing tech support for bookoo bucks, which of course means that Andrew has begun to lobby him relentlessly for a new HD TV. Andrew himself has gotten a job working for Minitext on campus, sorting books and carting them around. In other words, life is good at 1715 Lindig.

Aloha to "Aloha"

2005-06-24T17:07:00.000-05:00

I’m kinda on a roll with these two day blog entries, and why ruin a good thing right? Anyway, this will be my last entry from the lovely islands of Hawaii so enjoy it while it lasts (note: this is not the last entry in the blog, just the last entry from Hawaii. Minnesotan on the Loose will continue as normal from lovely Minneapolis upon my return.). It has been a wonderful trip with lots of ups, downs, and all arounds. I’ll try and wrap it up as best I can.

Yesterday we explored downtown, specifically the Royal Palace (the only one in the United States) and the State Art Museum. We started off by taking the long way into town after a scrumptious breakfast at Anna Millers, definitely one of our favorite places to eat during our visit, and parked at a downtown parking garage. From there we walked up and through the Royal Palace grounds, enjoying a few of the plaques describing its significance and the sights of its walls. It isn’t breathtaking by any imagination, but it is a neat piece of history that was great to see and enjoy. Following that, the fam and I walked over to the highly acclaimed State Art Museum, which features works by native Hawaiians and works portraying/discussing Hawaii.

The works at the museum really are a great collection and proved to be very thought provoking, though not in the way the artists’ obviously intended. As should be expected, many works in the exhibit deal with the takeover of the islands by the United States and the gradual displacement of the Hawaiian population by foreigners. The works describe themselves as expressing a quiet outrage of the indigenous population at the loss of their land and pass heavy judgment against western culture (aka: white people) who have ruined their paradise. While I understand where they are coming from, the whole thing is just a little heavy-handed about it and, at some points, can be downright racist in its presentation. Most of the works are highly enjoyable though, and I would definitely recommend a visit just to get an idea of where the Hawaiian artistic community is going.

In the evening, we went out for dinner with my cousin Nick and his family to Bravo Italiano, an Italian restaurant relatively close to where we have been staying. It was a monumental effort for them to come out with us since one of Nick’s new babies, Jaime, was sick in the afternoon with sinus congestion and had to be taken to the doctor’s office. I can’t describe how grateful I am though that he decided to see us again, considering that this might be one of the only times I ever get to see him and his family. The whole thing was so surreal for me. I mean, I don’t exactly have run-ins with long-lost family all the time, especially ones that are already married, have children, and are leading exciting lives. It’s just wild to think that there is this whole world going on out here that, in a very small way, I am a part of and am related to. Suffice to say that Nick is a great guy, and anytime any of you are in Hawaii, be sure to let me know and I will have you look him up to say hi for me.

Today, I woke up early and headed down to Waikiki with my dad to catch some surfing before I head back to Minneapolis. Surfing was good and I caught 5-6 good rides and 2-3 ok rides before heading in. It is just insane how crowded it gets down there; it really is amazing that people don’t get run over by surf boards and sliced up all the time. After surfing, Dad and I headed back to the house and had some breakfast before running a few last errands. That pretty much brings us up to the present, which sees us backing our bags and cleaning the house getting ready to return to our homeland,: the Twin Cities.

Overall, it’s been a great trip. On the positive side, the scenery of the Hawaiian Islands, especially the less populated ones, really is breathtaking. There are endless things to do and see and it is entirely possible to spend a month thoroughly exploring everything there is to do on every island. For the most part, the people are very nice and friendly and will say hello to strangers walking down the street, which definitely makes it a more enjoyable experience. On the minus side, there is the constant worry while in Hawaii about theft since it is so rampant and heavily advertised (everywhere you go, people/guidebooks warn of possible thugs or thieves), something nobody should have to worry about no matter where they go. Additionally, it is hard to escape the obvious resentment Hawaiians feel toward tourists since they are often rude to them or mistreat them for no apparent reason other than they are not Hawaiian. This makes it hard to enjoy some activities or experiences simply because some, though not many, people make you feel incredibly unwelcome.

My overall recommendation, after visiting, would be to skip Oahu unless you have family and friends to visit or are dying to see the Banzai Pipeline. The islands of Hawaii, Kauai, and Maui all offer much more in terms of adventure and scenery and are far less crowded than Oahu, especially Honolulu and Waikiki. Don’t get me wrong, Oahu is great, but Kauai was spectacular, and I’ve heard that the Big Island and Maui are equally mesmerizing. Thus ends my blog of Hawaii. For the last time, aloha!

Hawaiian Rollercoaster Ride

2005-06-23T08:05:00.000-05:00

Hawaii sure is a crazy place. I mean, it’s an island with a small population that is almost utterly dependant upon tourism to survive, yet crime, especially crime against tourists, is supposedly out of control. How does this make sense? There just aren’t that many people here, especially on smaller islands such as Kauai (right around 100,000 people), which should make it rather easy to find whoever is committing these crimes and take care of them. It’s not like they’re going to hop in a car and drive cross country to avoid being arrested…because they can’t! I would think that the big hotels on the island, who have an interest in tourists feeling safe, would pressure the local government to step up enforcement and crime would come to a screeching halt. That’s one weird thing.

Another is the convoluted road system, especially around Honolulu. Since there is so little room on an island for roadways, city planners have had to be extremely creative with the way they have made highways and local roads intersect. I’m 100% positive that this creativity impresses the hell out of other city planners around the world, but makes driving Honolulu a confusing ordeal for visitors. The funniest part about the road system has to be the three main highways on Oahu; the H1, H2, and, you guessed it, the H3. These roads are all great to drive, especially the H2 and H3, which pass through incredible scenery and are true wonders of engineering. The only thing is, these roads are labeled as “Interstates”… Somebody tell me again exactly which other states these roads intertwine with? The state of confusion? A state of shock? Very confusing stuff.

Things aren’t all doom and gloom here though, and two days ago was a perfect example of that. We headed out early in the morning for Kailua, reputedly the best beach on Oahu and one of the best beaches in the entire United States. My brother and I had arranged to take windsurfing lessons at 9:30 AM with Kailua Kayaks and Sailboards, something I had always wanted to try. Considering that Kailua Beach is one of the top windsurfing spots in the world, especially for beginners, it seemed like a great opportunity to learn. We arrived on time and walked down to the beach to meet with our instructor Aaron, a nice guy and a great windsurfer who originally hails from the Hoosier State of Indiana. The lesson started out with us doing some land work on the “million dollar simulator” – two pieces of wood with a swivel joint and a place to stick a practice sail in. After going through the motions on land and getting the hang of how everything worked and what all the pieces of equipment were (board, sail, boom, mast, universal joint), we hit the water and started sailing! Kinda.

As with any new activity or sport, it was tough going at first. I kept falling off the board, losing my balance, or losing control of my sail, which made it hard to get going in one direction for any length of time. After awhile though, things started to click, and right around 45 minutes into the lesson, I was sailing out to sea never to return! I’m serious about the never returning stuff. You see, it’s easy sailing downwind, which is of course how you start out since it makes sense to start off with the easiest thing first. However, in this case, sailing down wind took me out in the ocean a good ways rather quickly, which then begs the question, how do I get back? Sail upwind of course! Now, we had been taught how to do this, but sailing upwind is much more difficult than sailing downwind and takes longer to get used to. This produced a net effect of me shooting far out into Kailua Bay in about 35-40 seconds and returning to shore after 30 minutes of struggling. Quite the hilarious sight.

Windsurfing is great fun and I’m really glad I learned how to do it. My instructor said I was doing pretty well, since by the end of the lesson, I was tacking back upwind pretty well and reaching my intended destination. Kailua Beach, on a side note, is by far the most beautiful beach I have been to in the United States. The water and sand really remind me of Australian beaches, with soft white sand and sweeping turquoise water. Gorgeous stuff. After Andrew and I were done windsurfing, we hung out at the beach a bit longer then headed back to Nancy’s place, took care of a few quick errands (aka: picked up photos from scuba diving!), ate dinner, and grabbed some rest. Man alive was I tired at the end of that night.

Yesterday we woke up early and headed down to Waikiki Beach for some surfing action. At long last some surfing. After all, what is a trip to Hawaii with out some time on a board? We got down there pretty early, like 9 AM, and the beach was already getting full. The first order of business was securing a board for the day, something we accomplished by going to a rental shop a short ways up the road where the guy working behind the counter didn’t speak English very well, which definitely begs the question “What are you doing running a shop on Waikiki when you don’t speak English?!?!?” Argh! Anyway, I eventually got my point across and got myself a board for some wave riding then headed down to the beach.

The waves on Waikiki were really good, nice long gentle waves, perfect for beginners and advanced beginners (like me!). After a few snafus, I got back in the rhythm of things and caught a few nice rides. It’s amazing how crowded it gets out there though, with right around 40 or 50 surfers waiting on the same break, which is pretty dangerous and means that you have to dodge people as you’re riding in. Oh well, just part of the experience I guess. Andrew and Dad both gave it a go on the board, but came back in shaking their heads muttering “I suck” rather loudly. Haha, oh well, they’ll get better. The sun was really cooking yesterday, and I was very glad that I picked up a rash guard (aka: rashy) since it prevented the sun from burning a hole directly through the center of my back. Great day of surfing action.

A note to all the guys out there: if you want to see gorgeous girls, head to Waikiki. Suffice to say the number of amazing girls there was ridiculous, which you would expect with it being Waikiki and all, but still, pretty amazing to see. Kinda makes you dizzy after awhile.

Anyway, after surfing our brains out for like 5 hours, we returned the board and decided to hike up Diamond Head, the crater/cliff on the eastern end of Honolulu. It was a good hike up, no where near as intense as the hikes we did on Kauai, but still strenuous. The view from the top was pretty neat as it overlooks all of Waikiki and Honolulu as well as the suburbs to the north and east. After hiking back down, we settled on a place to eat, La Cucaracha (I know, how cheesy!), and headed back into Waikiki to locate it. It was a long walk to the restaurant, but it was well worth it, as the food was excellent (dare I say the best Mexican I have ever had???) and reasonably priced. It’s important to note the context of this restaurant experience to get an idea of what a find it was. Most of the restaurants in the vicinity of Waikiki are extremely touristy and overpriced, or in other words, serve average to mediocre American food for $15-25. La Cucaracha on the other hand was great Mexican food in an uncrowded atmosphere for around $10-15 per person. Great stuff.

Day over, we headed back home, had a few beers, and crashed. *Whew*, that was a long post to get through. Only two more days left in paradise, then back to Minneosta and my lovely girl, who will be returning from Venezuela. Hope everybody has enjoyed reading her posts as much as I have. Thats all for now, aloha!

Today Two Days

2005-06-20T20:44:00.000-05:00

I’m sure everybody is gasping in shock that I didn’t update my blog yesterday. Sorry about that, but I didn’t get home till late and didn’t have a good opportunity to write anything down. I’ll try and make up for it today as best I can.

Yesterday was another low-key day around Honolulu. I talked for a bit on the phone with Megs, who is nearing the end of her stay in Venezuela and has really enjoyed her trip down there. It’s always funny talking to somebody that has or is studying abroad to me as its always interesting to hear what they enjoyed, what they’ve missed, and what they’re most looking forward to seeing/doing. Sure will be good to have her back in Minnesota when I return.

Anyway, like I was saying, yesterday was relatively low-key, mostly because it was raining most of the day, which made it hard to get out and enjoy the outdoors. We made an early grocery run and I dropped off the film from our scuba adventure to have it developed, which I will hopefully have tomorrow to share with people. The big excitement for the day was visiting with my long lost cousins Nick and Noah, two family members I have only met one other time in my conscious life and people I think about quite often. At around 4:30 PM we drove over to the west side of the island to Nick’s place and met up with our cousins and their families. I’m sure anybody that has had a family reunion with distant relatives (in my case geographical distance rather than distant relation) can relate to, things started out a little awkwardly for everybody, both because everybody was trying very hard and because nobody really knows how to act around people that they should know well, but don’t. After some lengthy discussion though, we all ended up getting along just fine and the evening progressed along very nicely.

Nick and Noah are always an interesting subject to me, primarily because of the fact that they are native Hawaiians, something that seems to undeniably separate them from the rest of us. This has always been rather puzzling to me, mostly because, when I think about it, they are as closely related to me as any of my other cousins, all of which I know very will and have spent considerable time with while I was growing up. It has always been a sore point with me that I don’t know them as well as my other cousins, both because I have been unable (until now) to really visit them as an adult and because, quite bluntly, I have always been uncertain whether or not they would even want to meet me if I did make the effort. It always feels as if they have turned their backs on the Wambach portion of their heritage and don’t want much to do with us, even though I sincerely doubt that’s the case and have absolutely no reason to think that. Just a vibe I get when they come up in conversation. The bottom line is that they are just as family as any of my other relatives and I am very glad to have finally seen them at a time when it meant something to me.

So that was yesterday. Today we decided to circumnavigate the island, something Tony, Nick and Noah’s father, recommended we do. To start with, we drove up the west (referred to here as “leeward”) side of the island, which is an area few tourists visit, and you can see why. There is very little to do on this portion of the island, a portion that is primarily dry and poor for the most part, which means, quite unsurprisingly, that it is the side of the island that houses the greatest number of Hawaiians. It sure does seem that everywhere we go, we have a way of turning the current occupants into second class citizens in a real hurry and without much mercy. Anyway, much of the land on the leeward side is controlled by the US military, which uses the lush, picturesque valleys of the area for bombing drills and war games, loudly proclaiming to all that drive by that admission is not allowed and that people should beware of explosives. Seems rather odd to be using a part of paradise to be doing this kind of activity. Isn’t there a chunk of North Dakota that could be blown to smithereens without anybody but the cattle noticing?

After making it to the end of the road on the leeward side, we headed back to Nancy’s to get some lunch and cold water before heading over to the east or “windward” side of the island to visit the Byodo-In, a Buddhist temple modeled after a 900 year old temple in Uji, Japan. To get there, we took the H3 east through the valley, passing through some cool tunnels and torrential downpours. The temple was really a sight to behold, nestled in against the cliff face shrouded in cloud and mist, a blazing red challenge to the somber countryside. We walked around the grounds for a good while, snapped a bunch of photos, then set off in the Honda Civic again, this time for the much famed North Shore. For those that don’t know, the North Shore of Oahu is the most famous surfing destination in the world, home of Waimea Beach, Sunset Beach, and the Banzai Pipeline, some of the most famous surfing breaks in the world. Unfortunately, it’s summer, which means that these winter surf bears are currently hibernating under the guise of serene snorkeling beaches.

The drive was pleasant though, hugging the coast all the way north, ducking through small towns and villas bursting with people at the beach. We rented some snorkel gear at a surf shop near Pupukea Beach and dived into the cove for a short bout of snorkeling before heading home. Snorkeling at Pupukea was great, with beautiful fish darting all about and interesting coral formations dotting the bottom. Finally, we headed for home, showered up, ate some dinner, and otherwise unwound from the day. Tomorrow I’m going windsurfing for the first time in my life, something I’m really looking forward to. Until tomorrow, aloha!

I'm Goin Back to Honolulu, Back to Where I Started From...

2005-06-18T22:37:00.000-05:00

Well, after the maelstrom of activity we have had over the past few days, today was a relatively calm, sane day here in Hawaii. I started the day off by waking up just before sunset and walking over to the orchid garden in our resort to snap some photos while the light was good and managed to get a few neat shots. Pictures taken, I headed back to the room for some food and coffee where we made a few plans for the coming day.

We decided to start off the day by taking care of a little light shopping then visiting the National Botanical Gardens just down the street from the resort. There we walked around the visitor center and viewed the demonstration gardens though we didn’t take either of the tours available, mostly because they would take a long time and were really expensive ($30 per person). Anyway, after spending a bit of time in the garden, we drove up out of Poipu, through Lihue, and on to Wailua Falls, our second waterfall viewing of the week. Wailua Falls are a much more mainstream tourist attraction on Kauai since there is no hiking necessary to view the cascading water, only a short drive with easy parking directly across the street from the falls. It’s a spectacular sight, but bad weather has eroded the path down to the base of the falls, meaning that it can only be enjoyed from the one view provided from the road. After snapping a few photos we declared the falls seen and headed back into town for some lunch.

For lunch we decided to visit Kilohana Plantation, an old sugar plantation that has been converted into a series of shops selling various trinkets, art, and jewelry created on Kauai. The building itself is the most expensive house ever built on Kauai and is a palatial estate, sitting on 26,000 acres of land with a 15,000 square foot house. After lunch, we toured around the shops a bit, but didn’t find anything we really liked and headed back out to enjoy the rest of the day. Back in Lihue, we decided to visit the Kauai Museum, a great little museum with exhibits detailing Kauai’s creation, its early inhabitants, and modern history. The museum was really old school with a few musty dioramas and lots of typos in all the descriptions, but had some otherwise good information. We all agreed, however, that the museum would have been a much better attraction upon first coming to the island since the information it presents isn’t stuff you generally care about much on the way out. Oh well, it was still fun.

Following the museum, we headed to the airport to drop off the car and catch our flight back to Oahu. At the desk, the lady helping us bumped us up a flight so that we wouldn’t have to wait so long in the airport lobby, moving us from 5:50 to 4:45 PM, cutting almost an hour out our wait time. This turned out to be a fairly pointless move since the plane we boarded at 4:45 experienced mechanical failures that prevented it from taking off, forcing us to grab all our stuff off the plane, head back into the terminal, and board a different plane to Oahu. The crew was incredibly friendly and apologetic about the whole ordeal, which was nice but kind of unnecessary since I’m sure everybody would rather have them get a different plane than fly a broken one over the ocean.

Back in Oahu, we grabbed Nancy, my aunt’s, car from the parking lot and set off in search of some much needed dinner. I suggested that we try a small Italian place near the college called Auntie Pastos, something everybody agreed to readily and we found with fairly little difficulty. The food was good, dessert was awesome, and we headed back home for some rest. That brings us up to about now, with me finishing up my blog for the day and signing off for some sleep. Adios y buenos noches everybody.

Somewhere, Beyond the Sea

2005-06-17T22:05:00.000-05:00

The great thing about islands is the incredible variety of activities that are available to keep an individual entertained. While yesterday focused on the land based activity of hiking, today centered squarely on the aquatic pastime of scuba diving, one of the most unique ways of viewing the world to be found anywhere. The great thing about scuba diving is, though it requires a fair amount of knowledge concerning equipment and a good level of comfort around water, it is an incredibly easy activity from a physical perspective, making it the perfect way to recover from our grueling hike yesterday. Or so it seemed…

To start the day, Andrew and my dad had to meet the instructors for an introductory lesson and pool dive at 9:45 down the road at the dive shop. Mom and I dropped them off then headed back to the resort to take care of a few things around the room, most notably a load of laundry and a few emails. Shortly after dropping the two compadres off at the dive shop, we received a call at the room from them notifying us that Andrew had left his swimsuit at home and would need it to be delivered for the pool dive portion of his lesson. I frantically searched the room to find my room key, finally locating it beneath my journal, and headed out to make my delivery to the Hyatt Regency. Unfortunately for me, the pool lesson was not being given at the Hyatt Regency but the Embassy Suites, something I only figured out after extensively searching the seemingly endless pools of the Hyatt and failing to locate even one scuba diver. Honestly, what hotel needs 12 pools?!?!

Eventually I realized my mistake and found the scuba divers in training in time for their pool dive. From there I headed back to the room, finished my email writing, and left to pick up the guys after their lesson. We grabbed a few burritos from a small taco stand, snarfed them down quick, and got ourselves ready for some sweet diving action! At 12:45, we met back up at the dive shop and went through a few pre-dive briefings before getting on the boat and heading out for our first of two dives.

The first dive we made was to a location known as Stone House, a relatively flat boat dive around 45-50 feet deep. Visibility on the day was incredibly, ranging anywhere from 80 to 90 feet of visibility with water temps right around 80 degrees Fahrenheit. As a small comparison, when I did my open water dives, the instructors were ecstatic that we had 20 feet of visibility and 65 degree surface temps, considering it one of the best days of diving they had ever seen on Perch Lake. Anyway, suffice to say the dive was spectacular with great views of colorful coral and unique endemic fish species such as the Millet Seed Butterfly, Frog Fish, Anemone Crabs, Hawaiian Cleaner Ras, and a cool little Octopus. After our first dive, we boated over to our second dive spot for the day, Sheraton Caverns, reputedly the best dives spot in all of Kauai. It was an amazing dive through lava tubes and archways with cool tunnels that opened into hidden underwater crevices. The coolest thing about the dive was the numerous Green Sea Turtles swimming about the area resting and other unique species such as Wire Coral Gobies and Ornate Butterflies.

Dad and Drew did very well on their first dives today, thoroughly enjoying their first experience underwater. Andrew got a little sea sick on the boat and generously donated his burrito to the fish, but the rest of the dive went off without a hitch and I have to say that it was one of the best dive operations I have experienced so far. After the dives, we headed back to the resort, showered up, and went to dinner at Brenekes down the street, savoring the delicious Mahi Mahi and other tasty seafood dishes. It’s been three great days of adventure in a row now, which has been nothing but wonderful to experience. Tomorrow we will do a few cleanup things such as Wailua Falls and some light shopping before heading back to Oahu in the evening and continuing our escapades in full force. Ciao ya’ll.

You say Na Pali, I say No Problem

2005-06-16T22:31:00.000-05:00

What an unbelievable island.

Today we hiked the Kualolo trail along the Na Pali coast of Kauai’s north shore, easily regarded as the best hike to be found in the Hawaiian Islands and regarded as a strenuous walk even for experienced hikers. Starting off at our usual hour of 6:30 AM, we headed from Poipu (south side) to the Lihue (east side) to garner ourselves a few park permits. Officially, visitors to the Na Pali coast are required to have hiking permits, but from the sounds of it, very few people actually come and get them before heading out on the trails. During the discussion of whether or not to get a permit, my dad pointed out the kind of luck he has had in situations like this which convinced the rest of us, rather quickly actually, that playing it safe and getting a permit was going to be infinitely preferable to getting stopped along the way and forced back just because we don’t have a stinkin piece of paper.

Arriving at the office for the Division of State Parks, I bounded into the building and up the stairs to scope out the situation. The people who work in this particular Hawaiian government office have got to be the least helpful, slowest employees I have ever seen. It took me a good 10 minutes just to get somebody to tell me that I needed my ID to get a permit and that my family needed to be there too. Once we were all there, it was another 10 minutes to get somebody to talk to us again (bear in mind, wee were the only non-employees in the whole place) and begin processing our request. All in all, it took us a little over 35 minutes to get a free permit and a map, literally 30 seconds worth of work on a laser printer and a quick wrist motion to open a drawer and grab a map. Unreal.

Unnecessary permits procured, we struck out north in search of mountains and high adventure. Along the way, we drove through endless scenic towns including Wailua, Kilauea, and Princeville. The most enjoyable town along the way, hands down, was the small town of Hanalei, a scenic valley town situated on a sweeping beach with pictureseque rivers and taro fields around the southeast side of the town. Hanalei has a unique characteristic that makes it instantly endearing, a charm that oozes out its buildings, into the street, and straight to your heart in a way that is hard to describe as anything but magical. One of the unique things about Hanalei is that it is connected to the rest of the island through a series of one-lane bridges, bridges where the etiquette is to allow an entire line of cars to pass before the other side gets to cross (as opposed to alternating crossings on each side, which is much more common).

Just outside of Hanalei, we drove through the towns of Wainha and Haena, the last specs of civilization on our journey, and arrived at Kee Beach or, “the beach at the end of the road,” the starting point for the Kalalau Trail. Once there, we parked the car, used the beach’s bathroom, and geared up for the long hike ahead. Our path for the day was to be a two mile hike from Kee Beach to Hanakapiai Valley, the first and easiest leg of the Kalalau Trail, followed by a second two mile journey from Hanakapiai Valley to Hanakapiai Falls. Dad, Drew, and I were committed to making the entire 8 mile round trip hike, while Mom was going to hike the first leg of the journey to the valley and see how she felt. The first portion of the trip was a fairly steep incline at first over relatively rocky terrain, hiking conditions that are unquestionably my favorite since you get to basically bound up the mountain leaping from boulder to boulder, which really gets the blood pumping. Andrew and I, like yesterdays hike, quickly distanced ourselves from the folks, which was just fine since they wanted to go slow and we wanted to go fast (it wasn’t like ditching, more like you go your pace, I’ll go mine sorta thing).

We met up at Hanakapiai Beach, which has this super scary sign just above it tallying up the number of visitors killed by the dangerous waves and currents that can be found at this beach. The tally’s current count is 84, which pretty effectively communicates the signs message: STAY OUT OF THE FREAKIN WATER!!! Anyway, down at the beach, Mom decided to turn around and head back to the car, assuring all of us that she would be fine and that continuing on without her would not be the end of the world. Parting ways, we headed off to find the falls and immediately encountered the sweet aromas of wild ginger growing along the path. The path wound up and through the valley along a river, passing through different types of flora including some rather spectacular patches of bamboo and rich patches of ferns. Eventually we came to a series of rather difficult river crossings requiring good sized leaps from rock to rock over rushing water. Fun stuff. I should note that along our way we encountered many people that had already reached the falls and described it as breathtaking, which encouraged us to continue on despite the difficulties of the trail.

Hanakapiai Falls truly is an amazing site; 800 feet of waterfall dropping off into a deep, cool pool set in a deep valley with incredibly green, lush sides. After a quick snack and drink, the three of us dove in the pool and swam under the falls, enjoying the brisk, cool water after our difficult hike. Having enjoyed the waterfall and its invigorating pool, we headed back for the beach 4 miles away. It was a tough hike back, but fun because of all the views and the terrain. During the return trip, I met two people from the Park Rapids (Minnesota) area, the part of the state our cabin is located in, and talked with them at great length about Hawaii and the hike we had just completed. Just another example of what a small world it can be sometimes.

Hike finished, we took a quick swim at Kee Beach to cool off and wash some of the trail grime away. From there, we headed back down the highway to a small burger joint, Char Ono Burger, and had a few hamburgers and brews before viewing the Kilauea Lighthouse and the view from Hanalei Overlook, a great view of the valley floor. Seeing as how it was right around 7 PM by this time, we decided to head for home and get some much needed rest. Tomorrow will feature Dad and Andrew’s first attempts at scuba diving and my first unassisted dive as a certified diver. Pretty exciting. Hopefully I’ll have some more good updates to add tomorrow! Aloha!

Kokee State Park and Waimea Canyon

2005-06-15T22:53:00.000-05:00

Whoa baby what a day. Let’s start from the beginning…

Today began by waking up, scarfing some raison bran, and downing some delicious Hawaiian coffee. Kauai is known for its Kona coffee, a particularly delicious bean that my folks and I have been enjoying tremendously on our trip thus far. Anyway, coffee consumed, we set out for our day of high adventure in the Kauai countryside.

Our destination for the day was Kokee State Park located on the western side of the island just north of Waimea, the largest development on Kauai’s west side. The main attraction of the park is Waimea Canyon, a dramatic red-rock canyon commonly referred to as the Grand Canyon of the Pacific that offers significant eye-candy to those that are lucky enough to visit the area and excellent hiking trails. We began the day formally by stopping for a warm-up hike on the small Iliau nature loop, a short little walk to a good vista that we figured would be great for getting the blood pumping. After finishing our short “leg appetizer,” we headed north in search of bigger game and more exciting trails, planning to stop at the Kokee Museum to procure maps and water for the days hikes. We made it to the Museum just as it was opening, the rosey hour of 9:45 AM, talked with the creepy lady that worked at the place, got a few maps and postcards, and set off for the trails.

Yesterday I convinced everybody to try doing a trail known as the Awaawapuhi trail, which forms a loop with the Nualolo trail of approximately 10 miles and offers unmatched views of various valley’s of Kauai’s Na Pali region (it’s a pretty small island and you can see a looooong way on it). The Awaawapuhi trail, from start to finish, was stated as being approximately 3.25 miles from top to bottom covering a decent of 1600 feet, something that sounded reasonable to me and like something we all should be capable of doing without a great deal of difficulty. Ha.

We started out our hike at right around 10:15 AM and proceeded down the declining trail at a good clip. Andrew and myself immediately began to distance ourselves from the folks, but we waited up occasionally and tried not to get too far ahead. Eventually though, Dad gave us the go ahead to not check our pace and go as fast as we wanted to, turning us loose to our own devices and releasing us from our miserly rate of progress. The two of us, Andrew and I, picked up walking sticks and began to make good progress, counting off the mile markers in quick succession and encountering very little difficulty along the trail. Right around the 2.25-mile marker, while stopping to enjoy a good view, the two of us were quite surprised to have our Dad appear behind us slightly winded (slightly). He had been running down the trail to let us know that he and Mother were turning back, concerned that the trail was becoming too steep and that they would find it too difficult to get back to the top. We thought that sounded like a smart decision and arranged a time that we would try to be back at the top by with the understanding that we really didn’t know what time we would be back, so they would have to be patient and wait for us to complete our hike.

Andrew and I finished the rest of the descent without much difficulty and proceeded to the vistas down a separate path at the end. The views into the valley below were simply breathtaking; sheer cliffs dropping away to valley floors with meandering rivers, all shrouded with thick vegetation and a haziness in the air that reflected the fact we were 3200 feet above sea level. Pictures from this view can be seen on my Flickr page, and I would highly encourage everybody to the check them out. Simply awesome.

On the way back up, Andrew and I made a small detour to see Nualolo Stream, but the stream was dry (its been really hot and dry here lately), so we turned around and began the long ascent to the top. It was a really difficult ascent with several sections that were very steep and difficult, especially for two guys that don’t do much hiking on an everyday basis. But, though things looked grim at times, we made it to the top unscathed, if a little thirsty, and grabbed lunch at Kokee Lodge. It was a decent little place, though the waitress wouldn’t bring us any water because the place had lead in its water pipes. Ah just the thing to hit the spot after 6.5 miles of hiking, a few heavy metals and a pork sandwich!

After lunch, we checked out a few more views along Waimea Canyon road and headed back down the road to Waimea. In Waimea, we turned down a small side street and found a pre-western Aqueduct constructed by the Menehunes, the legendary “little people” of Kauai. The duct still carries water to taro fields and has a plaque showing it has been a national treasure since 1929. Definitely one of those cool things not everybody gets to see and really adds to the experience.

Back at the resort, I wandered down to the office in search of some wireless internet and found the resorts provided network. After sending out a few emails and catching up on current events, I headed back to the room, ate dinner, and watched a couple episodes of Lost with the folks. Tomorrow we will be hiking the Na Pali coast, reputedly Hawaii’s best hiking trails. Super pumped for that. That’s about all for the time being, better get some rest if I’m going to do any hiking tomorrow. Aloha ladies and gents!

First Day in Kauai

2005-06-14T21:58:00.000-05:00

Today the fam and I flew to the garden isle of Kauai, the oldest of the Hawaiian Islands. Rising at a rosey six AM, we drove down to the airport, parked the car, hopped a shuttle to the airport, and caught our flight to Kauai. The flight was ridiculously short, something like 35 minutes, and, unlike our last flight, everything ran super smoothly (prompt takeoff, great flight attendants, and no unhappy little ones), making it a rather enjoyable trip. At the airport, we grabbed our car rental from Dollar Rent-a-car, a brand spankin new vanilla Dodge Magnum. Talk about a beast! This thing has got a hood that just doesn’t stop, making it rather difficult to drive, but its got lots of space to stow our gear, which is a rather good thing. Anyway, we navigated through the capital of Kauai, Lihue, and made our way to the resort town of Pihue, which (gasp!) is the location of our resort.

Once in Lihue, we attempted to check in to the resort, the Kiahuna Plantation Resort, but were told that the room would not be ready until right around 3:00 PM. It was 11:45 AM. So, we did what any sensible people would do: got Mexican food! After some sopping wet burritos from this little hole in the wall place up the road, we checked out the surfing scene and discovered that the entire southern side of the island is reef break, making it rather dangerous to surf for beginners (Andrew and Dad) and rusty intermediates (yours truly). Abandoning our impulses to grab boards and run for the surf like 7 year old boys for first base, we decided to occupy a small portion of beach near our resort and work on improving our complexions from their ghostly white state. During our time on the beach, I rented a foamy (foam surf board) and paddled around a bit in the break water, but things were pretty flat by the time I was out there and I only caught a few odd waves (all of which I stalled or crashed on). Additionally, our time in the sun managed to turn every one of us into crispy morsels for pitying eyes to feast upon. In particular, Andrew and Dad burned their backs rather spectacularly, though I did my very best to keep up with their attempts at a whole body blush.

After the beach, we checked into our room and cleaned up a bit for some late afternoon adventuring. The place we are staying is absolutely spectacular, with views down to the ocean, gorgeous landscaping, and a rich history as a former sugar plantation and noted garden. A bit farther down from our resort, we visited Spouting Horn Beach Park, a lava tube that, when struck by approaching waves, produces great geysers of water and a fantastic whooshing sounds. Around the park were various craft dealers selling their wares and a few dozen wild chickens. For those that don’t know, Kauai is the last Hawaiian island where you can still find wild chickens in great numbers since it is the only island that has remained free of the Mongoose, an introduced predator that feeds on ground nesting bird eggs. Anyway, on the way back, we stopped by the grocery store and picked up some supplies then grabbed dinner at Plantation Gardens, the spectacular restaurant located within our resort. The restaurant is built within Moir Gardens, an amazing cactus and orchid garden that is simply stunning to walk through. Dinner was amazing with fancy plates of fish and prime rib being served in delicious sauces to an ocean view. Ah Hawaii. Good day overall. Tomorrow we’re going to do a bit of hiking in Kokee State Park, I’ll be sure the let everybody know how it goes. As for now, aloha.

Well Alooooha!

2005-06-13T21:30:00.000-05:00

Aloha from the Hawaiian Islands! For the next two weeks, my blogs will be coming from these isolated islands of intrigue and adventure and hopefully I can provide some interesting things to read about. Anyway, on with the show!

Backstory: Around a year ago, my Dad began talking to his sister Nancy (my aunt and commonly called Nan for short) about the possibility of trading houses for a period of time this summer. Nan expressed an interest in being in Minnesota for an extended period to visit with family and friends and see sights she hadn't seen in a long while. We all promptly threw our hands in the air, screamed "WOOPEE!", and began plotting ways to make this experiment in short term real estate swapping a reality. Sufffice to say it worked out, which means that at this very moment, Nan and her significant other Chuck are currently occupying our palace in Brooklyn Park while I digitally scribble my thoughts from a slightly more exotic locale.

Yesterday the fam (Dad, Mom, and Andrew) left Minneapolis at around 3:15 PM for the island of Oahu, approximately an eight hour plane flight on a Northwest DC-10. The flight was one of the more miserable flights I have had, settling right behind my flight to Michigan last fall (2 hour delay with a SCREAMING baby) and my return flight from Las Vegas when I was 16 (hot pot of coffee dumped on my head, then offered my choice of red or white wine as retribution). It took off late, had crabby flight attendants who didn't feed us, poor storage, and a crying baby (though not screaming, thank goodness). As advertised, the flight took right around eight hours to get to Oahu and touched down with one of the smoothest landings I can remember experiencing. We grabbed our bags and hopped into a taxi to get to Nancy's house, which turned into a rather exciting in unexpected adventure since the cab driver found a way to violate just about every traffic law ever enacted. Oh well, we survived.

After settling in a bit, we consulted my trusty Lonely Planet guide for a place to eat. For those that don't know, I'm something of a Lonely Planet junky, especially after my trip to Oz, and consider their advice gospel. The fam and I decided on a small Sichuan place called Maple Garden that sounded excellent and set off to navigate the mean streets of Honolulu in my aunt's fast and furious Honda Civic. I was elected driver since I was considered the calmest of the available candidates and I got us to our destination with only a few minor snafus. Dinner was good, came home, watched some Lost (greatest show EVER!), wrote in the journal, thought about Megs for a bit, and hit the hay. Not bad for a first day.

Today we went to breakfast at this little place called Anna Millers which had good pancakes and great coffee (Kona, mmm). After that, we went to the Pearl Harbor memorials, most notably the USS Arizona Memorial. This is the battleship that was sunk during the surprise attack on December 7th and still leaks oil to the surface. It's one of the more impressive war memorials I have seen and has great information all around. We took a ton of pictures at the ajoining submarine park, but skipped the actual tour of the sub ($10 each was just a little too steep to walk around a cramped compartment with a bunch of buttons we couldn't touch). All in all, Pearl Harbor was fairly impressive, but the boat ride out to the Arizona, the main attraction, was quite ironically the most disappointing part of the whole thing. It's a cool concept to be sure, but the fact remains that there just isn't that much to be seen out there and the glare from the water makes what is there difficult to see. The rest of the day we chilled out and made our plans for tomorrow's trip to Kauai and the ensuing four day excursion we will be making on that particular organic oasis. kauai should be a great time and I'm really stoked to do a bunch of the different hikes on the island.

Alright, that's enough for now. Aloha.

Crazy Two Weeks

2005-06-11T11:11:00.000-05:00

Man, talk about your busy times. The past 2 weeks have been absolutely insane in Frankland (you know, the imaginary little world I seem to occupy continuously). Lets start at the beginning...

The biggest thing during this maelstrom of activity has undoubtedly been the preparation for Fusion Dance's Spring Performance. Extra rehersals, costume work, stage prep, and dress rehersals all lead to some busy dance teachers. Last night we had our first of two shows and, overall, everything went very very well. My mom, dad, grandma, and brother all came down to watch the show along with Kristen (Andrew's girlfriend) and Pete, Andrew and myself's roomate. Everybody said they were very impressed by the show and that all of the dances were enjoyable to watch, which is actually a fairly difficult thing to accomplish (aka: no clunker dances). Laura and I had our reunion duet performance which went quite well, no heart attacks, broken bones, or black eyes. Anyway, one performance done, one to go tonight, then my year long stint with Fusion will be over and along with it, my dance teaching career. It sure will be a sad day when I'm done teaching those kids, they all work so hard and are so enjoyable to work with.

Next on the list of big events has been our move from Berry Place to the house in Falcon Heights. Finally, we're done with that place and the creepy ladies that run it (think really intense with bug eyes, *shudder*). The new house is really nice and everybody needs to come visit us, its got enough space for everybody AND everybody's friends, so undoubtedly we will be having a few get togethers for some chips, soda, and some late night streaking. Pete has been working hard to wire the place up and has successfully installed internet into our office downstairs and Andrew's bedroom next door (the house, previously, was not wired for internet). It's so great to have an office where we can keep our computer crap seperate from the rest of our stuff, and it makes for great video game playin'!

Another big thing going on, though not as big (yet) as the first two things, is preparation for our trip to Hawaii! Thats right, Hawaii. The fam and I are leaving for Hawaii tomorrow afternoon, the 12th, until the 25th. We are going to two islands, Oahu and Kauai, of which I am definatly more excited to see Kauai. I'm going to try and keep this blog updated while I'm there, though probably not on a daily basis. I'll also try and keep my Flickr photo page updated so you can see some of the rad scenary of the Hawaiian Islands.

Other misc. stuff that has gone on has been trying to keep in touch with Megs (who recently updated her blog which should be checked out by all), getting my scuba diving liscence, and trying to get a full time job (two interviews and an online assesment). Anyway, gotta bunch of stuff to get done today, so this is the formal end to this long post. Ciao.

Diving, Moving

2005-06-06T09:23:00.000-05:00

This is a post I actually meant to write yesterday, June 5th, but I got distracted. Imagine that; me, getting destracted, how unexpected. Haha.

Anyway, yesterday I received my Scuba diving certification after completing my open water dives. Now I can travel the world and spend lots of money looking at a bunch of coral and fish. Yeah, even when I try to disparage it, scuba diving still sounds pretty cool. Let me tell ya though, diving in a lake in this part of the world during this season is a COLD endeavor. Up until about 13 feet or so, its pretty nice. After that, it starts getting cold real quick.

Today is going to be moving day for Andrew and I. We are leaving Berry Place in favor of expanded grazing areas present at the new house. Sure will be nice to have my own room.

Alright, I'm putting this pointless blog out of its misery. Adios.

New house, dance, and traveling

2005-05-27T17:11:00.000-05:00

Been a few days since my last entry, but things have been pretty busy around here. Me and the boys are getting set to move into our new place, a sweet house over in Falcon Heights. Best thing about it: we all get our own bedrooms! Finally! I think if I had to listen to Andrew and Kristen cackle at the top of their lungs at 1 AM one more time I would have taken them both down with throwing knives the following morning. The place also has an awesome yard, kitchen, and main rooms, but the bedrooms are definately the high point. Me, I'll be livin it up in the master bedroom (which has its own bathroom). Go ahead, feel the jealousy :).

The dance season has officially come to a close and Fusion's spring performance (aka: recital) is looming large. Overall it was a very successful year and our kids made some great improvements as dancers. It's always such a joy working with them, but the commute to Red Wing is such a killer that it makes the job hard. Last night, Kev, Andrew, and Rory came down to the studio and helped me teach which was awesome. It's always fun when they come down because it adds a novelty to the experience that is hard to match and because the guys are hilarious around the kids. Definate high point of the evening had to be watching Rory do sit-ups with Andrew; Rory, the military machine just pounding the reps out and screaming at Andrew to do the same. Hilarious.

Megs has been having a great time in Venezuela so far and everybody should check out her blog that she is keeping (there's a link to it in my links section). Additionally, it looks like Ta is having a great time in Denmark, and is doing a real good job documenting it so far (again, there's a link to his blog in my links section). The two travelers, off exploring new locales and cultures. Anyway, I miss you both deeply and hope you are having fantastic experiences abroad. Take care everybody.

Driving thoughts

2005-05-20T01:09:00.000-05:00

Alright, I'm fully into missing Megan. It just kinda hit me on my way home from work tonight as I was screaming "Running On Empty" into my windshield. You see, Megs and Jackson are the two people that I really tell it all to, and Mr. Browne never has much to say back. I guess I just miss calling her on my way home from work and listening to her struggle to stay awake and talk to me, even though she's tired and probably hasn't slept more than 3 hours a night for the past 4 nights. I miss ending over 50% of my phone conversations with an enthusiastic "Buh Bye!!!" Most of all I miss coming home from a long night at the studio and snuggling up against her and smelling the intoxicating scents of her hair as they waft through my dreams, giving me a primal feeling of rightness and goodness, something that just can't be duplicated. Miss ya Megs.

On a different note, there can't be an artist that has written more honest, meaningful, and true songs than Jackson Browne. I mean, Running on Empty has got to be one of the most poetic songs I've ever heard, capturing perfectly the feelings of a young man in transition. I could go on about others, but whats the point. They're all amazing. Guess I'm writing about this cause listening to his music always makes me feel good in a sad kind of way, which is undoubtedly how I feel about Megs right now. I'm glad that she's out adventuring and I have every faith that she is having a fabulous time, but it's sad to be away from my best friend. It's sappy, I know, but it's the truth and there's no avoiding it.

Rain and stuff

2005-05-18T12:11:00.000-05:00

How does my room get so messy so fast? It's crazy. I'm normally a clean guy, I keep things picked up and put away. Then all of a sudden, I wake up one morning and realize that my desk, both above and below it, is completely covered in junk. Furthermore, I have no place to put said junk, which makes it difficult to alleviate the situation. Argh, more cleanup I guess.

Been three days since I dropped Megs off at the airport and I already miss the little trouble maker. I've gotten 2 phone messages from her so far, and it seems that she made it to Meridia just fine and is making lots of new friends. Of course, this is exactly what I expect; I mean who wouldn't want to be friends with a cute, charming girl like Megs?

Been raining here non-stop over the past 3-4 days. I know I know, the flowers need it, its good for the crops, yadda yadda yadda. Bottom line: those greedy flowers don't need this much rain, and damnit, I need some sun. Makes for some nice sleeping though; the soft patter of descending moisture, sprinkling soft sustenance onto the earth and washing away worries with a wet wand. Alright, enough of this bumbling entry, I got stuff to do.

Bye bye baby!

2005-05-15T07:43:00.000-05:00

This morning I dropped Megan off at the airport for her six week adventure in Venezuela. Six weeks without her sure will take some getting used to, considering she is my best friend and my closest confidant. Yeah, it may be a little rough not having her around, but I'll survive. Hopefully.

Anyway, before she left, Megs was pretty anxious about the whole thing, worried about coming back, being safe, liking her host family, and meeting friends. Seems to me that all of this is perfectly normal stuff to be worried about, especially the night before you leave. That's because, after you step through the terminal, the choices basically stop and you get into autopilot mode. Flight attendents tell you where to sit and when to get off the plane, hotel clerks tell you where to sleep, school directors and representatives tell you what classes to take at what time and in what rooms, etc. etc. But the night before...the night before is the time you question whether any of it will be worth it, if everything will be ok, if everyone will still love you when you get back...its endless. It's a maddening experience, but in many ways, it's a good experience. It isn't often that we thoroughly question what we are doing and why, what our motives are, and what all the possible outcomes could be. Undoubtedly, that seems like a good thing, questioning who and what you are and what you want or why you do what you do.

Maybe the real revelation in this though is that such questioning can't be done all the time because it is simply too stressful to put up with consistently. Kinda puts a big hole in the whole "live life to the fullest" and "question everything all the time" decrees that are so often uttered by individuals that haven't even got a clue what life is, much less a plan on how to fully enjoy it. Seems like living that way would get really stressful and confusing really fast. Is that why im always so stressed and confused? :) Anyway, at the end of all this, all I want to say is that this morning I had to drop off my lovely girl at the airport and that I'm going to miss hanging out with her for the next six weeks. Adios.

Excitement and Exhaustion: A weekend at a dance competition

2005-05-08T21:00:00.000-05:00

Dance competitions. Alternatively referred to as 'Soul Stealers', 'Day Destroyers', 'Daylight Obliterators', and 'The Edge' (of human sanity). There are very few things crazier than dance competitions. An entire weekend of mothers obsessing about their spoiled, snobby daughters, dressing them up in various stripper outfits, and joyously celebrating when all this nonsense is rewarded with a piece of plastic made for eight sixty-thirds of a cent in some factory in Taiwan. Kinda hard to understand in some ways; completely natural in others. Amidst this debachery and buffoonery, there are moments of genuine artistry; moments of tenderness. Kinda makes it all worthwhile, those moments.

This weekend was the first time I had seen a number that actually revolted me, no small task considering some of the routines I've seen over the years. The number was the 2005 rendition of 'International Playboys,' Larkin's annual guys number that wows audiences and judges alike and usually leaves with a top award. This years number featured boys from the ages of 6 to 17 wearing Chippendale inspired bowties, white tuxedo jackets, and tight black pants. During the routine, all boys girated, stripped, and wriggled in and out of their coats provacatively, ending up in a large group of half naked boys posed for the audiences delight. The show alternatively drew cheers from the boys' parents and disgruntled wives glad to see some fine flexing and headshaking, muttering, and raised eyebrows from a much larger segment of the audience that found the routine to be simply too much. Call me old fashioned and prudish, but I find it hard to accept the sight of a 6 year old child performing what amounts to a strip-tease on stage to the drooling cheers of parents with no thought other than that plastic first place trophy on their mind. What's next? Is next years edition going to feature an interactive feature where the audience gets to place play money in these boys' g-strings? How about some naked mud wrestling, or a little bondage? Why is Michelle Larkin choreographing this garbage? What is her obsession with naked 8 & 9 year old boys? Hard to understand. Seems to me that an event designed to provide child performers a venue to show their skills should feature just that, children performing. Again, I'm all for artistry and pushing the envelope, but watching a 7 year old child strip provactively to a tight pair of pants is not artistry, it is perversion. Please parents, make it stop.

Brrrr...

2005-05-02T22:28:00.000-05:00

Wow, today was COLD! And not in that kind of "Oh gee, isn't it a chilly spring day?" kind of way where you can still find pockets of sun that provide those tickles of warmth but in the "Someone is attempting to exterminate all life in Minnesota again" kind of way. We have wayyyyy to many of those extermination days for my taste. I always feel sorry for those flowers, trees, birds, and bees that have had the gutts to peak their little noses out only to be slammed down hard for their unparalleled courage. Seems kinda like a natural course of events though, those who are willing to take a chance are often punished for it. Flowers or humans, winter or society. Pick your party and your poison, the net results are the same.

On to cheerier things! Got to go to applebees and eat chicken fajita rollups. Is there anybody out there that does't love these little rolls of joy? If there are I have yet to meet them. Alright, Megs is kickin me off the lappy in a desperate play for some sleep, so this is the end of entry 1. Ciao.

Crazy Megan

2005-04-25T20:17:00.000-05:00

Crazy Megan
Originally uploaded by *Dancin*Jim*Slade*.

This was a photo I took after Megs had tackled me to the ground and was refusing to let me up. Pretty funny. We soon started making weirdo faces at each other, with one of those faces being captured in this photo. I can't even describe what she looks like here, maybe a Road Warrior or somethin...Anyway, enjoy!